Sharp Family Blog

Summer Time Fun Pt. 2

2011-11-15T22:15:00.000-07:00

This is a post that should have happened back when it was warm and sunny, not with a cold front blowing through that threatens to freeze the snot (literally) every time you head outside. I finally figured out how to get the pics that I have been whining and crying about! This first one was a summer fave: The Idaho grandparents bought a slip and slide for the slight incline in their backyard. This was as close as Mr. C was willing to get to it.

The other kids had no problems getting closer and enjoying.

And here is that fish pic from the 15 minute "let's see if this little fish pond really is free for kids" expedition. This is why my oldest son is a fish whisperer. They didn't bring very much gear, cast his rod 3 times, and he still caught a pretty little trout. Too bad he and the others won't eat it. Do you know how silly it makes you feel wrapping it up and putting it in the freezer, knowing you will be the Frozen-trout-thrown-in-the-trash Fairy that night? At least we didn't have to leave any money behind.

The Horrors of Halloween

2011-11-12T18:49:00.000-07:00

Huzzah! The camera has been found! Pictures are again being taken! The cord to connect the camera to the computer to transfer the pictures, on the other hand... well, let's just take it one step at a time, and maybe this post is better without pics. Because it is absolutely frightening and horrible just in story form. Let me tell you about the month of October...

October started out in a pretty normal fashion. It had started to cool down, school was in session and everyone was adapting well to the new schedule. We started thinking about the end of the month, when there would be a birthday, Halloween, and even into November, with plans for Thanksgiving. I should have known better. Sometimes I really wonder if Karma is one of the ladies on my street who pretends to borrow a cup of sugar and ask how things are going. When those plans actually involve the future, I think she gets a little mad at me and decides to mess it up. That, or she is so impressed with my scheduling abilities, that she figures a few curve balls really won't do that much to what has already been planned. Personally, I think her cable bill was just getting too high, and has been cancelled because America's Got Talent is over and she needs a new reality show (me) to keep from being bored.

We got hit and hit hard with strep, croup, Ben's normal breathing problems, and the 24 hour stomach bug that was actually 72 hours with a little lull of wellness in the middle. I have never hated a month so much. Nadia's birthday had to be rescheduled, I missed 2 of my RS pres meeting which made me feel like a total slacker, we couldn't sleep at night because Ben and Caleb were having breathing issues and the dog who sleeps in our bedroom snores at weird times, and my back was already starting to give me grief even before climbing up onto bunk beds and kneeling on hands and knees to clean up messes. I was tired. Poor Cliff would have helped more, but he had the Sounds Choir commitments of singing in Salt Lake, doing a fireside, and singing with a friend for a talent show. He wasn't home most nights till after 10.

Now for the truly scary part of the month...Nadia's almost birthday party, Parent Teacher Conference, and Halloween. We had handed out the invites, I was a softie and let her invite 2 more friends than we had originally agreed upon, and even had the talk of how you don't tell all of your friends about your party, especially the ones who were not invited. We cancelled the morning of the party after a visit to the ER to find that Caleb had croup. Not so fun when you don't have everyone's phone number or address. As for Parent Teacher Conference, I don't know how we lucked out to get a time when Cliff was actually home from work with no other commitments. The Halloween Carnival at school was okay, because the oldest 3 were actually able to go. However, it would have been better if they hadn't brought home 3 goldfish from the games part of the carnival. I think I am raising a family of Fish Whisperers, because that is the only way to explain all of the fish that have been caught this year. Too bad you can't get a college scholarship for that. And too bad that they died within a week of us spending $90 to make sure they would last. That's right, THEY DIED. Halloween came and it looked as if we would be okay. But no, we hit the rebound section of the stomach flu at this time, and so all of the candy I bought for the Trunk or Treat is still sitting in the cabinet where I hide everything, and the kids know what and where it is.

When the carnage of sickness was finally over, and it seemed as if we would all survive, unlike the germs, I got up to bear my testimony about how Cliff kept telling me I needed to ask for help. I really didn't feel like it was a good idea to call someone over and let them and possibly their family get sick, especially since I would just need a few days to catch up once everyone was well. I kept thinking I could do everything myself, when what I really needed was some reassurance and comfort. So I finally asked for the right help, said a prayer and got a blessing, and things looked a lot better, even if I still had to scrub the carpet and wash pillows for the 2nd time that day. After sacrament meeting, 5 people asked if I needed help with anything, did we want to come over for dinner, spouses were volunteered for work, and I was told several times that I have a lot of friends in the ward, so there is no reason to not ask. Not why I bore my testimony, but it was nice to hear.

A Year With No Pictures

2011-10-27T22:40:00.000-06:00

You like that title? Could you see me as the author of a book by that title on all the talk shows? Or are you just thinking, "Poor pregnant Sarah, can't remember how to blog AND post pics at the same time", which could also be totally true. Or maybe that I am just a little less organized than normal and have good reasons for not taking pics for the last few months. Good, because I think that's what is happening to me right now. I either can't find the camera, the batteries have just died, or the phone was just dropped and needs some serious TLC to get it working again.
I was going to take pics of the snow we had at the beginning of October, with all the leaves on the trees, and all the damage it did to those trees. Brandon built a pretty cool snow fort in the back yard, we had a huge cocoa and cookie party, and we actually got to use the fireplace for a whole 35 minutes before it got too warm.
Nadia is a decade old. Do you know how depressing and scary that is for me? What do I do with a double digit girl? Apparently, don't tell her she can have a friend party after having a family party because it will get way out of hand and all brothers will expect the same. I told her she could invite 3 friends over for pizza and a movie, on the 2nd worst weekend ever for us, and it has ballooned to 6 1/2 friends I think (don't ask about the half; too confusing) who will be here this Saturday evening from 5:30 to 8:30. Cliff was kind enough to reign in the time so it wasn't til 9:30 or 10, but there has been mutinous talk about lasagna and chocolate cake. I can't take it.
One of the reasons I am so worried about it is the almost 8 year old and his photographic ears listening and memory when it comes to things he feels are fair or important. I think we are raising a communist boy. He can't remember the second part of a two part command, like "pick up your backpack (#1) and hang it up(#2)" or "get your shoes on (#1) and get in the car (#2)", but he remembers that Nadia was told only 3 friends and now has 6 1/2 coming over. It doesn't matter that when his birthday rolls around I will be the size and have the coordination of a beached whale. It doesn't matter that we just found out that he has flat feet and some metatarsal bone thingy that needs correction, and may be getting him uncool corrective shoes because that's all we can afford, because Nadia had a great birthday week. And since it is all about being fair, he must be able to have all the same things. Wonder what he'd think if we got him some cute boots and Littlest Pet Shop toys.
Benjamin at least will still love me after December. I think. If I can find him some Diego set that his friend who just moved got for Christmas like 3 years ago. Yeah, I'm sunk. At least he's still cute most of the time. He is trying to go through a defiant stage right now, but it really doesn't work that well when he hugs me after sitting on his bed in time out and tells me we are buddies. Unless that is his plan, to try to manipulate me with guilt or gratitude. About a week ago, we had burritos for dinner. Cliff made them. Ben came over after picking through his and said he was proud of me while giving me a hug. I realized later that he left the table after that, instead of sitting down and finishing his dinner. I am in big trouble.
That just leaves our soon to be not youngest, Mr. C. I think his favorite words right now are "fruit snack" "go out" and "esh", which is Calebese for shoes. He is usually throwing them in your lap or trying to put them on your feet while he says it. And of course, there is the dreaded "uh-oh". I realized what a terrible slacker I have been with child proofing this time around; Caleb is a tyrant in the kitchen and bathrooms. He has to turn things on if they're off, and vice versa, put things in the trash or pull them back out again if he decides they're still useful, so basically all those things that drive a mom crazy. But then he says his most favorite word, "banky", makes me sit on the couch, and snuggles into my lap with him and his blanket. That has got to be one of my most favorite times of the day. Unless it's right in the middle of making dinner or getting kids out the door for school. But we're working on it.

Summer Time Fun Pt. 1

2011-09-10T11:12:00.001-06:00

So, what do you do in the summer time, when all the world is green? That Primary song goes into some of the many things we did this summer, and thankfully, not some of the things we did this summer.

1. We went down to Delta for July 4th, as is the yearly tradition. We did shake it up a little this year by letting the children go early. Cliff's parents came up to see him in "The Sound of Music" and took the older three children down to Delta with them the week before the 4th. We were worried about homesickness and keeping to some kind of sleep schedule since the other cousins were also going to be down there, but those worries were for naught. They couldn't wait to get off the phone with us so they could keep playing, and they were exhausted by the end of the day after being on the slip 'n slide, playing at the park, riding bikes, and other fun activities.
By the time we joined them, it was the weekend of the 4th. We had a great barbecue with ribs by Uncle Beaner, the kids were able to ride in the bike parade after decorating the bikes, we went to the regular main street parade, there were the regular after-parade activities, and we even got some fish. Oh yes, fish. It was hot enough that the horse rides ended early, and so several of the kids wanted to find something else to do instead. They found the fish pond, which if you're like me, sounds like the little blue curtain where you fish for a prize. Nope. This was a real pond, which the Fire Station had set up, and was stocked by real fish, courtesy of the Wildlife Dept. There was a huge truck filled with fish, and they would fill up the pond about knee high with water and let the fish loose, followed by a horn to let in the kids in different age groups. Kambrie and Brandon were just so excited to try it, and they both caught fish with their bare hands. I had a pic of Brandon with his fish, but it was taken on my old phone which Cliff was using at the time, and the old phone and new computer have decided that since they have nothing in common, there is no need for them to talk to each other. Who knew technology could act so immature. So *click* here is Brandon holding a 19 inch rainbow trout that he caught with his bare hands, made Daddy clean and cook, and then decided he didn't like the taste.

2. Cliff had hernia surgery and bought a new suit, which means I get a new mixer for Christmas. Cliff has had a hernia for a while, but we weren't sure what it really was or if it would heal on its own. He started to get worried when he felt a small bump protruding out of the tear, and even more so when it became painful. He finally went to the ER to get it checked out after googling hernias. They did a CT scan, determined that yep, it is a hernia, nope, it isn't an emergency, but he needed to have surgery within a month. We scheduled it for the week after his birthday, and as a last hurrah, (I am 88% positive that Cliff thought he wouldn't make it through the surgery) we went down to SLC for a birthday weekend date without the kids. It was a lot of fun. We went to a Salt Lake Real soccer game with some great friends, got some baby stuff from them since I had thrown out our stuff and their twins were getting too big for it, slept in, watched the last Harry Potter (FINALLY), paid way too much for a breakfast buffet, raided another friend's ward on Sunday,and just generally had a great time.
We even went to Men's Wearhouse and looked at a new suit for Cliff, because they were having a buy one, get one free sale on everything. Here is my warning about this: Don't go to the Sugarhouse store, and definitely run away if you meet a salesman named Randy. He is GOOD. Cliff got two suits, and not just any suits, but two High End Suits, two new shirts, four ties, and a boatload of guilt. That is why I am getting my mixer for Christmas. Oh yes. It will happen this year.
We got back home and the next day was Surgery day. Cliff had to go at some beastly early time to be checked in and prepped, and after dropping him off I came back home, woke up the kids, took them to my mother's where they got dressed and had breakfast, and then drove back to the hospital in time to sit by Cliff in recovery. I hated it. He is not ever supposed to be in a hospital gown or bed again. We checked him out around 11, came home, and I took care of him a little and just let him rest. He went back to work the following Monday, and has a new appreciation for me and what I go through with pregnancy pains and babies. It is also kind of funny to see how we now compare his scar with my Cesarean and I have to tell him it will get smaller and less noticeable like mine has. Who says guys aren't vain? And yes, this is definitely a good time to not have any pics.

Well, this post is definitely getting a little long, so I will continue later. Stay tuned for the further thrilling adventures of our summer! Oh yes, there is more!

Excuses, Excuses

2011-09-08T21:37:00.001-06:00

I know, I know, it has been a REALLY really really long time since I last posted on here. But I do have some pretty good excuses that kinda sorta explain my absence. Here they are, in random order:

1. I lost the camera. There were a lot of things I have wanted to post about, but let's face it, a picture is worth a thousand words. Especially when it's Brandon holding up the first fish he ever caught or Caleb figuring out how to wear the fire fighter helmet backward and hold 6 things in his hands and teeth while playing with something else on the floor.
2. Cliff was in a play. Now this sentence could also be used to describe what we did this summer, except that we did so much more after the play was over. You have no idea how much work goes into a production until you are actually in one, too. Cliff auditioned for "The Sound of Music" and was given the part of Uncle Max. I was pretty happy with this until I found out that Uncle Max has two songs that are not in the movie. It meant a lot of "just mommy" nights for the kids, and a lot of staying awake until 11 pm for me. But he did a fabulous job, and as biased as I am, I can also truthfully state that he was definitely one of the fan favorites.
3. I was called to be 2nd councilor in the RS presidency. Cliff knew this was coming. I didn't. The old presidency had been in for quite a while, and let's face it, when the RS president asks the bishop pretty much every Sunday if she can be released, he will eventually listen. She was wonderful, by the way, but never thought she was. When the bishop asked to stop by our house, I assumed it was to give a talk. Then Cliff reminded me that I had just given a talk the month before, and that I would be getting a new calling. He even hinted at RS. Yeah, he can be a jerk. I assumed, if he were right about a calling, that it would be nursery, because those ladies had also been in a long time, Caleb was getting close to 18 months and I'd most likely be there anyway, and let's face it, nursery is more my speed. No such luck. Also no luck with getting released from compassionate service right after I was set apart for 2nd councilor, we were in the middle of a baby boom, and my Enrichment Night leader was one of the new moms. That's all been straightened out now, thank goodness. That could have been my entire summer and excuse for not posting more often, with the added complication/blessing of...
4. I am expecting a little boy in January. No, not the exchange student kind or babysitting or even "if the weather's bad I'll pick you up" expecting. This Sharp family is going to modulate (add another sharp) again. P.S. My sister has already told me that for Christmas she is sending me a ten foot pole that I can use to whack Cliff any time he tries to get close enough to whack, and if you really want to have another baby, tell everyone you know and even random strangers that you are done, and then get rid of all baby clothes and all other essential baby gear. It really works.

In closing, I wish to inform you that I will commence with updating the blog and going over summer details even if there are no pics to go with the stories. I think I have made a good case to show why it has been so long since I was last part of the blogging community, and promise to do better as long as nothing else earth shattering happens. Like hernia surgery or new glasses or paying way too much for a suit that's actually two suits plus some new shirts and ties and...wait a minute... those happened too. See what I mean? I am glad fall is finally here so I can get a break. Yeah, I thought that was a pretty funny sentence, too.

Kids Say (And Do) The Darnedest Things

2011-03-21T22:01:00.000-06:00

Caleb has been very funny lately. He has finally decided to walk, and it was quite the ordeal. He wouldn't walk to me or Cliff, but he walked for the cute Anderson girls when they were here. Then he stopped walking again. The turkey. He finally started walking for Cliff and me, but we really have to play it up in the excitement area. I mean there has to be lots of cheering, hand clapping, and a few handfuls of confetti with the mini parade floats. Okay, so maybe that last bit is exaggerated, but boy, do we have to put on a glad face for walking or else he pouts and screams.
Talking about screaming, Caleb has started. Not good. Especially when I babysit a little 4 month old girl and one of them gets startled or scared. They are both "sympathetic criers", also known as "divas", meaning if another kid is crying or screaming, they have to join in, and then see who can outdo the other in loudness and intensity. There are days when all I do is sit on the couch with one on my left side, and the other on my right, and just listen to the two of them try to out diva the other and see who can hog more of my lap.
Caleb has also discovered his life's work: he is going to be Santa Claus. Or a shoe elf. But as his mother, I am biased and going with the glitzier career choice. That's right, Lauren, your dream job is going to be filled by my little boy. He goes around the house playing with cars and making the noises, until he finds a shoe. Once a shoe has been found, the car must go into it. If there is no car available, another object can be substituted. I have found cars, legos, a marble, and a sippy cup in my shoes this past month. I can't wait for Christmas and stockings.
Benjamin really made me laugh last night. He came up to me after dinner and dessert, and said, "Mom, when I say DumDum pop, you need to be quiet." He even did the little shushing finger to the lips like a librarian does when you're just a little too loud. I was a little puzzled, but told him okay, and then he went to my dad and asked him for a DumDum pop. As soon as he said those words he looked right at me, and what could I do? I had already said I would be quiet. You see, he usually asks right when we're getting ready to drive back home from Sunday dinner at my parents' house, and so I usually stop him before he can ask. The clever little boy figured out that if he asked earlier in the evening, and got mom to be quiet, he might actually get a chance to have a DumDum pop. Yes, he did get one, and boy, was it hard not to laugh with him right there.
If you hadn't heard, I wore my hair in pigtails not that long ago, and Ben wasn't a big fan of it. I asked him why he didn't like them, and he said, "Because all the kids at school will laugh at you." Yeah, it made my day. It really did, because I couldn't stop laughing at it.

Ladies' Night

2011-03-03T15:57:00.000-07:00

Last night I went out to dinner and a movie with some great friends. Cliff was a little skeptical of the idea, because we went to see "Tangled" and eat at Taco Bell. I told him that this was the only way any of us were going to be able to watch that movie without someone sitting on our laps, directing musical movie chairs, or whispering in our ears. I even got to wear a necklace, because no one would be pulling on it. I know, it's the simple things right now.
It was a lot of fun.
Except I really missed comments like, "I would kill that bad guy dead so fast" or "He has really sharp teeth", that are whispered with a wind gust measurement of 30-35 miles an hour while simultaneously on the verge of chewing off your ear. A lot of those comments are more entertaining than the movie itself.
Although, I am quite glad that there were no meltdowns when the popcorn was gone and everyone went potty without crying and screaming.
Taco Bell was also nice, because we got to order our food without waiting for small people to make up their minds 3 times and then change it yet again after the order has been delivered to you. Everyone ate all of their dinner and even put their stuff away.
In other words, I was spoiled last night. I was thinking of trying to do this about once a month or so, but I don't know if I could handle it all. Well, maybe I'll still try it and see. ;)

Nadia's 3rd Grade Musical

2011-02-23T09:11:00.000-07:00

This is a picture of all the 3rd graders singing for their performance at school. I don't remember if the program had an actual name, but all of the songs had to do with the planets and galaxy. We have been hearing about "Interplanetary Mail" and "Moon Madness" for a couple weeks. I have been trying for a week to get the video from this and Caleb's birthday to load, but I think the files might be too big. That's a shame, because Nadia really got into the milky way rap. She is definitely a performer.

Anyway, she really enjoyed it and did great during her speaking part. Brandon and the other 1st graders also got to see it. Benjamin was very excited to go, until he got there, and then kept asking if they were done yet. The little turkey.

My Brother's Backwards Post

2011-02-07T20:52:00.001-07:00

Apparently, it's been so long since I have downloaded more than one picture that I forgot that they usually go in the REVERSE order than what I think they need to. Anyway, here is my SoCal Bro Steven with the two little boys that will probably out do him for head traumas and giving parents gray hairs. They may be cousins, but they are definitely brothers in the mayhem, mischief and cute departments.

Here we have Caleb and cousin Aaden at the January birthday party. I think Caleb looks sad that Aaden got the cash and he just got a lousy truck. Rotten parents.

This is the other cousin, Parker. Is it okay that I secretly hate him? Okay not really hate, but I am definitely more than jealous of this little cutie and all that hair. He is 6 months old and has had 2 haircuts already. My kids? Maybe the first haircut when they're 2.

Here is Steven with his darling family. His wife, Sarah, (yes, I totally love her name) and their two little boys came to visit us freezing Idahoans for almost a week. We have also convinced them to come back this summer to actually do stuff outside instead of staying in their SoCal house that currently has no AC. We had a great time with them and can't wait for summer!

The Big Talk

2011-01-19T12:06:00.000-07:00

Cliff and I have done our best to let our children know that they can talk to us about anything. We will do our best to answer any question or offer advice to help solve a problem. We even have answer and question sessions once in a while for family home evening, just so they know that we are always available, and that we can talk about anything at all with them.
Of course, there are a few subjects that I am a little, shall we say hesitant, to discuss with them. I am sure that every parent has a few of these. They can be awkward, you wonder if you are giving too much information for their age and understanding, and you would prefer to do it as a united front instead of being blindsided by yourself. So what do you do? Shut down the dialogue, or soldier through it?
Readers, I am proud to say that I soldiered through. Nadia and I had the talk about Justin Bieber, and I made it. Oh, did you think I meant THAT talk? Been there, done that. This was much worse.
She came home from school the other day saying some girls had teased her because she didn't know who Justin Bieber is. One of the girls has his phone number, or is his Facebook friend, I don't remember. I just remember I wanted to cry. It means Nadia is now surrounded by Tweens.
BUT, because we as parents had made the decision to be honest and open about everything with our children, I gritted my teeth and we looked him up on Wikipedia and then found a link to see 2 of his music videos. I have never been prouder of my daughter than when she said, "He really isn't that good."
Now, some of you may wonder what the big deal about this is. It means the end of childhood, and I wish I were joking. Tweens are not natural; they are simply kids that have been exposed to too much too soon. I want my kids to remain kids as long as possible. They will be grownup too soon. They need to have memories of being children, not tiny adults.
So my children will continue to dress like children. They will watch children movies and shows. We will keep the lines of communication open, and when the next Big Talk comes up, I will try to handle it with all the grace and finesse of a giraffe. Because that is what I am. A giraffe who loves her children very very very much.

The Incredibly Romantic Getaway

2011-01-02T20:48:00.002-07:00

Cliff gave me a wonderful present for Christmas: a romantic weekend getaway. No kids, no calls, no work, just the two of us running away together. Doesn't that just sound exciting and fun? Are you jealous?
So who wants to guess how many ways it went wrong?
1. A huge cold front moves in. Do we stay or do we go, and risk the possible blizzard? How romantic will it be to return home to an ice cave because the pipes burst while we were gone? Can I sell the pics of our ice encrusted house and (finally) pay off the dentist?
2. What do you do when the friends you want to visit in Boise have to go to a grandfather's funeral in Utah? And your Utah friends are coming up to Idaho to see her parents? Can Cliff and I actually have a conversation that doesn't include who stayed dry last night or why that contractor insists on using the J-47 sealant instead of the epoxy overcoat system? Who can we now include in our weekend so we can rely on them for all of our conversational needs?
3. My incredibly loving yet diabolical brother got the new Rick Riordan book and gave it to me. Can I read it on this romantic getaway? Can my love of books and my love for Cliff live peacefully side by side, or must they eventually tear each other apart? And after that last sentence, have I read the inside flap to too many romance novels?

So what actually happened on this incredibly romantic getaway? We stayed at home. I cleaned a bathroom and Clifford took a nap. We moved the big TV into our bedroom for New Year's Eve to watch 4 hours of Leverage and ate some subpar cheese bites. I bought a new coat and Clifford didn't complain while I was shopping for it. Clifford shopped for a 32 gig Ipod Touch and I didn't complain while he searched (in vain) for it. We baked cookies and a pie and slept in until 8:30. And we loved it.

Some Day

2010-12-16T19:40:00.002-07:00

Some day I will be able to decorate my Christmas tree exactly the way I want it. I won't have to use plastic ornaments, or string popcorn and cranberry garlands, and I will use any color scheme I so desire. The ornaments won't be bunched up with big patches in between, because kids want to keep their special ornaments together. There won't be a loud train constantly being turned on and then knocked off the tracks from the excitement of watching it go.
Some day I will be able to do holiday baking without interruption. No one will cry because they are getting some orange slices with a cheese stick instead of the gingerbread girl with all the sprinkles. Nothing will burn because I am dealing with baby drama. Holiday treats will go out to the neighbors on time, instead of sporadically throughout the winter season and maybe even March.
Some day I will have to decorate my tree all by myself, without small hands to help. I will be the only one to sing with John Denver and the Muppets; I will be the only one to see if all the lights are working. It will be quiet and maybe even a little somber, instead being full of voices and joyful impatience and life. Ornaments will go up without the excitement that only comes from a child unwrapping a welcome surprise.
Some day all of my holiday baking will be done with efficiency and some degree of cleanliness as well. There will be no small and warm body pressed against mine and the counter while we try to measure together. I will have to figure out what to bake by myself, without the help of strong and loud opinions or promises already made to teachers and friends. Instead, there will be rows of naked gingerbread people and no ideas as to what they should wear.
Although I may at times wish for Some day, I need to remember the little joys that I can be a part of today.

Thanksgiving and Lots of Other Stuff

2010-12-01T16:33:00.000-07:00

I am angry. Oh, I am absolutely furious. And I am to blame. I lost our camera's memory card while on the way to the store to print out pics. I even had a little nagging thought that I should upload the pics to the computer first, but didn't because I am lazy. So I lost everything on that card from our trip to Delta. Sigh.
This first pic was going to be of all the snow we have received, so you could see how incredibly brave/crazy/delusional/stubborn we were to attempt the drive in the first place. In fact, after it started snowing on Monday and didn't stop, we were all prepared to have Thanksgiving up here instead. Then we got a phone call Thursday morning and were persuaded to try. The roads were ice until Pocatello, where they miraculously started to clear up. I swear there is an invisible weather line there, and up north things must stay icier and colder than down south of this line.
The next picture I wanted to show you was of Brandon and Braedon playing Wii basketball together. Brandon dominated the game. Not my word. Braedon is getting a very fine BYU sports education.
Nadia had some toe drama and had to be driven from Delta to Springville. I did not take any pics of this, either of the toe or of the drive. That toe is something that not even a mother could love, and the drive is just kinda meh.
We started Brandon's birthday early, since we were with lots of cousins and grandparents. We went to Nickel City and let the kids loose with bags of nickels for arcade games, and they also got to play laser tag. This is where I could really kick myself. I had pics of the kids playing and getting ready to unwrap presents and even of the little confectionary delights that go by the name of cupcake from Deseret Book. Those were bites of heaven, my friends. And pics that just can't be replaced. Ugh.
We then went and saw our good friends the Styers, and had a great time visiting with them. That should have been the end of the trip, but it wasn't. After getting back on the road and merging onto the interstate, Cliff got a call from his high school best bud. He and his family were currently in Salt Lake. We couldn't miss that chance, and so we went to Temple Square and visited with them as well. It was so well timed, and so wonderful to see them again! I love to see Temple Square at Christmas time, and love to see old friends even more.
It was perfect. The roads on the way home were okay, and we did have to take it slow from Tremonton UT all the way home, but I am so glad we left when we did. The next day one of the big news items was how many cars were sliding off the road from Provo to Salt Lake. It would have been a miserable trip if we had waited!
So this week I am going to continue to hunt for that card, and then probably buy another one next week. And I'll find the lost one right after that.

Sibling Revenge

2010-11-19T23:18:00.000-07:00

Now that I have talked about all of my sibs, I thought it only fair to reveal a few embarrassing and maybe funny stories about myself, before any one hacked into my account and did it for me.
So what was I like as a child? Well, my dad used to call me his "Stepford Child", referring that I was perfect. Unfortunately, this isn't too far off the mark, and it makes for some creepy home video watching. While some of my other siblings would sit for a few minutes and then start to spin the chair or suddenly do a cartwheel, I would sit in the chair, ramrod straight, with my arms folded. I was so still it's hard to tell if I was breathing. My parents were "Mother" and "Father", and I enunciated every word like I was on an ESL program.
Did you know I used to be a hoarder? Oh yes, I was. And it was those little Pillsbury layered biscuits that I simply had to have. I would gorge on them at dinner, and when no one was looking, I would slip a few onto my lap for later. Then I would hide them in between the bed and dresser, or in my sock drawer. See, Krista, it could be worse.
I used to have that Dorothy Hamill pageboy/bowl cut. Look it up on Wikipedia and see the disaster that was my hair. I hated how short it was, especially compared to my sister's divinely lovely hair that went at least halfway down her back. My parents finally let me grow out the back, so I had an almost mullet. But being the incredibly serious child that I was, you can be sure that even with business in the front there wasn't a party in the back. Maybe a pleasant chat between friends, but never a party.
Did you know that I used to cry while reading a book or watching a movie? And it didn't even have to be that good? What am I saying, I still do that. You don't want to know how many tissues I went through when Dobby the house elf died in the last Harry Potter book. J.K. Rowling is a monster.
So when did I become the incredibly chic, cool, suave and witty woman that I am today? Ha! I will tell you: I am the world's best actress. It is all a front. I am still that little geeky girl just waiting to be exposed. Which is why I find it amazing that people talk to me on a regular basis and actually invite me to things.
And now you know more about me.

Sibling Memories, Pt 4

2010-11-18T23:29:00.000-07:00

John, John, John. Tonight it is your turn. Not that you even read this blog, but I certainly could never leave you out of all the fun.
To start, I must make a confession: I am not, nor was I ever, that interested in The Tick cartoon. But you were, and I wanted to do something and have something in common with you. I mean, as great as it was to order Taco Bell with you, you can only talk about how good the bean burrito is for so long before you need another subject. It was a great tool to get to know you better when we were getting older and didn't have the same friends or same interests even. Okay, and maybe there were one or two parts that actually made me smile. "Homer? The Odyssey?! Read a book!"
Steven once told me I was so nice that he could demand, not even ask nicely, but demand a million dollars and I would figure out a way to get it for him within a week. Or maybe 24 hours. I can't remember the time frame, but it was ridiculous and I am glad he never asked you, because you are really the one who would have done it. You have always been "The nice one" in our family. You always got up and made sure every one's soda or popcorn was topped off instead of just taking care of yours, like this older sis so often did. You are still teaching me all the little ways it's possible to serve others.
Your comedy skills, on the other hand, have needed just the tiniest smidgen of help. Like the time you told a boy I was dating that I was going to break up with him. While he was making dinner for our family. I had no idea what was wrong, other than that he looked a little ill, until after I had sent him out the door. Of course when your comedic education is based on UHF, Dr. Demento, and Monty Python, there may not be as many people who get the subtlety you strove for. It has improved with time, and you definitely make me laugh.
Do remember when you didn't like chocolate or anything green, not even green jello or kool-aid? Let's just say you made dessert interesting. And Saint Patrick's Day? Forget about it. But as you grew older, you decided to give things a second or even 5th chance, and you are now quite the adventurous eater. It's one of the many things I admire about you.
With all of the strong and opinionated people in our family, it would have been easy for you to just follow the path one of us had already set. You have never done that, not when you were little and had your own language, and not now that you have become older and dj dances. You were always calm and set in what you wanted to do, not what some else was telling you to do. It's a wonderful quality to have, and you definitely possess it.
So here's to you, my youngest brother who is now a menace to society: if only real menaces were like you, then the world would be a truly wonderful place. Now go and date that girl.

Sibling Memories, Pt 3

2010-11-17T22:27:00.000-07:00

When my dad was a little boy, he often told people he would have thirteen little girls. Little did he know they would all be rolled up into a tiny little ball and named Lauren.
I hated Lauren when we were young. She was cute. And I mean she was goldurn stinkin' cute. I never was. She had gorgeous long hair and looked amazing in those little frilly Sunday dresses. I never did. And she got everything. You remember Cabbage Patch dolls? She had two. Me? None. Doesn't matter that I was too old to play with dolls, she got two. When we did home videos, she was the star, even when it was my turn.
She was a Houdini growing up, and simply couldn't stay still. But even when she climbed out of her crib and fell on the radiator, she was cute. When she ate Dad's black licorice and had the juice all over her face, she was still cute. Incredibly wrong for liking that nasty stuff, but the Licorice Monster was cute. The only time she wasn't cute was when we had to share a water bed and kicked each other. And that is as far as I will concede on the kicking in bed front, Miss L.
I hate to admit it, but I am still a little jealous of her cuteness. I have come to accept that she is the cute little kitty and I am the giraffe in the animal kingdom of our family, and that giraffes have some good qualities too, but man, there are days when I really wish the cuteness fairy had sprinkled just a little bit my way when she came and showered my little sis in cuteness.

After high school, Lauren suddenly became fun as well as cute. Or more likely, I finally matured and realized she was a great sister and we had a lot in common. We both miss European, especially German, Christmases. Christmas in the States just doesn't compare. We are both chocoholics and love hot baths and reading. We like spicy food, and are game to try just about anything once. Shoes and purses call us by name and speak to us.
We did some pretty crazy stuff and still laugh about it. There was the time I was driving after we had finally found some chocolate coins for Christmas. The coins fell on the floor, and Lauren went after them, only to get stuck between my leg and the steering wheel. Just a little awkward, and of course there was no shoulder, just two giggling girls. She could beat any boy in a belching contest with just one can of A&W root beer. I'm also pretty sure she was the one who came up with the nickname for "Rainbow Brite", a guy I dated twice.
She grounds me. I can't go longer than a week without talking to her on the phone. She still makes me laugh and giggle like we're about to do something silly and crazy again. And I am sure we will.

Sibling Memories, Pt 2

2010-11-17T00:06:00.002-07:00

Oh, Steven, where shall I begin? With the time you shoved peas up your nose to get a laugh, only to discover they were actually stuck? You always could make anything fun, even when it was kinda scary like not ever being able to breathe out of your nose again.
Or the fact that I now know why mom skipped the gray and went straight to white, because I have a 3 year old Steven of my own and the hair dye to prove it? And what is it with the two of you and always always ALWAYS hurting your heads?
You were always making us laugh and smile growing up. Unless you were out taking another trip to the ER for stitches. I remember one summer when you seemed to be making a trip a week there, and of course it was when we were visiting Grandma and Grandpa Soelberg, so not only did it look like you had crazy abusive parents, but that we had fled the country before any of the staff could get the police involved. I will tell you, I often wondered with all of your head injuries why Mom didn't just do your stitches herself, since she had a sewing machine, because then it wouldn't take so long and maybe the thread would match better.
Do you remember when you almost killed John? Of course you do. I don't think that story will ever leave the family story tellings. But then, you have never doubted yourself or your abilities, even when they involved you being Batman and flying with Robin (John) on the pulley swing. I have never seen dad run so fast as when you lost your grip and landed on that skinny red headed brother of ours.
Or how about the time you decided to leave the house and take a walk by yourself? Right after we had moved to a foreign country? And when dad finally found you, you were eating ice cream by an old man in front of a little shop? Absolutely no fear. It is something I have always been a little jealous of, because I second guess and doubt myself all the time.
You could also be incredibly giving. There was one day when I came home from work in tears because I had lost some money in the till. My bosses didn't really care all that much about it, but I took it incredibly hard. You gave me a little stuffed dog that you were going to give to a girl you had a crush on. A girl who had really bad hair and skin, and was basically black mailing Steven to like her, just in case Sarah his wife is reading this.
But one of my favorite memories is when you were a news anchor in elementary school. You read that news and turned to face the cameras like a pro. The other kids were lost the whole time, but never you. Boy, there are some guys who never get that professional even when they are paid for it. And that comb over you had that started right over your ear was the icing on the cake of news announcing perfection.
I think I will end this now, before the warrant for my arrest goes outside of California. Oh yeah, being in the sheriff's dept in LA gets you a lot of pull. Seriously, Steven, I think you are swell. I'd let you write me a ticket anytime. But not really.

Sibling Memories, Pt 1

2010-11-15T22:13:00.000-07:00

Remember how I am keeping a gratitude journal on Facebook? Well, it has finally decided to haunt me. Or at least, my sister has. You see, I recently wrote on there something about how I am thankful for siblings and all the crazy memories and love I have with and for them, and she called me out by asking me to expound.
I take the challenge. All week, I will be writing memories I have of my siblings, and seeing as how none of them live close, except the youngest who I am positive doesn't read my blog because it doesn't have anything to do with Halo or Mario, I can say anything. Mwah hah hah hah hah! (Evil laughter)
Tonight, I begin with my brother Jacob, who is currently in Afghanistan, and can not kill me. At least not for another 10 1/2 months.
Things I remember about him...
I remember when he had braces. He was the first in our family, and I remember thinking what a cry baby he was on tightening day, especially when there was no more yogurt or ice cream in the house. Then I got braces on my bottom teeth after my mission, when I was working in the military dental clinic in Germany. Easy peasy, I thought. Later that evening, I went to institute, where we would have a meal before starting class. I had taken several bites of soup when the spoon barely tapped one of my teeth. I calmly but quickly made my way to the bathroom to see how many of my bottom teeth had fallen out from that spoon incident, only to discover they were all intact, even if I had never felt such agonizing pain in my life. I have never doubted that my brother has a high pain thresh hold after that.
He is a fantastic athlete. He did cross country in high school, and played on a special "talented" basketball team.. After we moved back to the States, both ice and street hockey were added to the mix. He now runs 6 minute miles, 4 miles at a time, for his regular workout, with some other things thrown in to keep it interesting.
Then there were the times we played GI Joes and Star Wars together (what a nice brother!). Even after I was done with Barbies, I had a hard time letting those little figurines go, and it was because Jacob made it fun. He was so creative with Legos and came up with awesome spaceships and guns, and had all the cool sound effects to go with them. He let me drive around with him in the trunk of my car (in my defense, there were 9 of us in front, and he simply would not fit), and he was dragged out of bed like me to watch scary movies with my dad. Oh, and how many times were we thought to be an incredibly handsome couple when we went to institute together? Or the lady who took our missionary pictures and I swear pulled out a wooden spoon because we weren't sitting close together? "Sit closer! Pretend you like each other! CLOSER!!!"
Good times, good times. Keep safe, Jacob, and Ah luff yew.

The Little Things

2010-11-07T21:25:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking of things to be thankful for this month, in recognition of Thanksgiving. I think it's a holiday that gets the shaft, being squeezed in between the costumes and candy of Halloween and the Spiritualness and presents of Christmas. It should be less about the Alka-seltzer and over eating with a football game thrown in and more about how thankful we should be for all our blessings.
It has been in this vein that I have posted something on my status every day on Facebook about something that I am thankful for. It's been pretty easy so far, and it makes me think more with the "Attitude of Gratitude" mindset during the day.
Something I am very grateful for that I haven't yet mentioned is the humor I get every day as a mom. I love some of the things my kids say. They don't always know it, but boy, do they make me smile.
Benjamin asked me the other day if he could have a drink of eggnog. Oh, we party hard in the Sharp household and have eggnog from October to February, or whenever the store finally runs out. I told him there wasn't enough for every one, so he needed to find something else to drink. He sat at the table, started rubbing his chin, and thought. Then he came back at me with, "I think I would like something that tastes like eggnog." "Like what?" I asked. I was thinking something sweet, like maybe hot chocolate. "Like eggnog."
Brandon was complaining to a friend that he (the friend) was better than Brandon in everything. The friend replied, "That's not true, Brandon. You are a better reader than me. Much better." I was very impressed, and waited for Brandon to thank him. Brandon smiled and said, "What else am I better at?"
Nadia is learning colloquialisms and those little phrases we all say but don't necessarily understand or even get right. My favorite from her was when I answered a question quickly and she said, "Wow mom, you got that right off the back."
All the snot, drool, and worse is worth it for those little nuggets and the smiles I get from these four amazing children.

Halloween 2010

2010-11-05T09:36:00.001-06:00

This is Nadia's costume for Halloween. She was an angel, with glitter in her hair and wings on her back. I wouldn't let her have a trumpet, though.

Brandon was a ninja. So was Ben. I was going to make ninja stars for them, but then realized that my two boys + ninja stars = trouble.

Ben only wore his whole costume Halloween night. But he loved putting on the little ninja shirt I made for him. Uncle John dressed up as a GI Joe. Ben couldn't leave his gun alone.

This was another costume that Ben's been wearing lately: the knight costume. He has been fighting me on nap time the last few days, but apparently this dragon mom knows better than the nightie-knight boy.

Nadia is Nine

2010-11-03T10:08:00.001-06:00

Nadia turned nine last Monday. I can't believe she is so old! We went to Leo's Place for pizza and the play area, watched "Despicable Me", (very cute) and had a birthday dinner with the family. Dinner of choice? Spaghetti with meatballs.

She just wanted a simple chocolate cake this year. Maybe she's getting old enough to realize I just make wrecks out of the cakes, or maybe she was more interested in chocolate this year. I am not asking.

This was the big present this year: her very own boombox! Now she can close her door and listen to music all afternoon and ignore the rest of us. Wait, isn't that supposed to happen in a few more years? Are we really getting to the "Tween" stage with all its drama?

Well, at least Caleb is still small. For now.

Totally Awesome Is Totally Gone

2010-11-02T16:07:00.002-06:00

I must make a confession: one of the biggest reasons why I haven't posted very much recently is because we just got a new computer. I am still figuring out what is on here, what programs need to be reinstalled, and how incredibly stupid I am because the programs that are already installed are so incredibly different than what we had before. I sometimes think that computer programmers hate us normal people and are getting their revenge on us all for not saying hi in the hallway back in school by changing everything they possibly can while still keeping the name of the program the same.
On the left is the new hotness. On the right is the totally awesome, totally old tower. It was about 7 years old, which is 3,876 years for a computer.

Funny story- when we went in to stores to look at new models, Cliff told one of the guys that he couldn't tell how much memory the tower had. It just said something about an eye-teebee. Come to find out, that means one terabyte. 1 TB. We knew we were way out of our league after that.
This is the external hard drive that holds all of the memory on our old computer. ALL of it. Our new computer has over 10 times the space that our old one did, even with upgrades over the years.

And now that I know my pictures are no longer lost in cyberspace and are posting in a regular manner, let the blogging begin. Again.

Rant on Wednesday

2010-10-20T16:04:00.000-06:00

A long time ago, there was a little rhyme that told you the days of the week and the chore (or chores) to be accomplished on that day. I think it went something like, "Bake on Monday, mend on Tuesday, wash on Wednesday"...and of course I can't remember the rest. After this past week, however, I am certain that ranting went right along with the washing. It would take some serious motivation (or frustration) to wash all the clothes on an old scrub board, and let me tell you, I have it right now. Maybe that's why I bake so much and still haven't gotten a mixer-I take it all out in the mixing and kneading.
So what am I all worked up about? Here's the list:
I took the boys to the store with me to finish getting Halloween things and look at present ideas for Nadia. They were pretty excited to come with me, until it was time to look for stuff for Miss N. Brandon asked why couldn't we just get her a card and be done, because there were toys for boys to look at the next aisle over. I almost told him that it was a great idea, and we'd do it for him, too, but he'd already had one meltdown in the store.
What was that from? From me telling him I wasn't buying Caleb a Star Wars Clone costume for $20. He was a little upset, and then decided that maybe it was okay if Caleb went as an elephant or pea pod instead. Umm, no, those were all still $15 to $20, and why am I spending that on something Caleb will wear for MAYBE 3 hours one evening? He has a pair of overalls, and pair that with a good plaid shirt and one of the dress up hats, we have a cute little farmer. Apparently, this wasn't good enough, and thus was born the first meltdown.
Not to leave anyone out, I must confess that I also had a meltdown when I realized how much we were spending on Halloween. Who knew that an angel, 2 ninjas and a farmer would be so spendy? And time consuming? Or am I just being the Grinch of Halloween since we just finished off paying the children's dental bill?
That of course left Ben being the only mature one of the group that evening. So now I will tattle on him. What is the deal with 3 year olds cuddling up to you when they are sick? And then whispering in your ear, "My mouth is hot," just before the tidal wave bursts the dam? Huh? What did we ever do to you (besides the whole potty training debacle) to deserve that? And why do they always always ALWAYS eat or drink something red right before they spew? Fortunately, this time it was Cliff and not me. Hey, I call it like I see it, babe, and I still had to clean up the whole mess, so we're at least even on this one.
Family Home Evening this week was a painful experience as well. I thought we would talk about Moses freeing the Isrealites, and how when we do what the prophet says, we stay safe. Unfortunately, I went way too far in the background story, and they lost attention until the Angel of Death came around. Then we got all kinds of questions.
"So the blood was on the door or on the door frame? 'Cause that would be confusing if it was on the door."
"Does Jesus kill us if we don't obey?"
"Is there a real Angel of Death? Does he still look around doors?"
"But if it's night, how does the Angel know if there's blood or not?"
I kid you not, these were all questions asked and then answered. But not by me, because at that point, I was just trying to wrap it up and not kill any one after being either interrupted or ignored the entire lesson. I will not stray from the Gospel Art Kit lesson again.
Well, I just heard the timer. Time to take another loaf out and punch, er I mean put another loaf in the oven...

M is for Masochism

2010-10-13T10:26:00.001-06:00

As the mother of 4 children, I am asked the following question: "Why?" I know, that surprises some of you, but people do ask me why I have 4 children, and if they are truly brave, cringe as they ask the follow-up, "Will you have more?"
There is just one answer to both questions: I am a masochist. It is the reason I became a mother in the first place. Why else would I purposely decide to go through at least 10 years of short hair and write "Not Tissue" on the lower half of all my pants?
I have joined a preschool group. Or more accurately, I have volunteered to help teach 5 smiling terrors once a month, with a 3 week reprieve between torture sessions. Now, those of you who have not fallen off your chairs laughing at this are probably wondering what the big deal is. Well, it's pretty simple: I am not a teacher. I am an excellent enforcer, as my children will all tell you, but I am still learning how to teach. Except for the whole slow neck roll with lots of cracking noises, I could probably teach that, but once again, that's because I am an enforcer.
Monday was my first teaching experience. We did F is for Fire Fighter. I was going with F is for Fish or Frog at first, but couldn't find enough stuff for younger children. The boys came over at 10, and were slated to leave at 11:30. I was trying to not get too nervous and convince myself it would be like educational babysitting, and that it would go by in a flash.
At 11:45, all the boys were out the door, and it was safe for me to curl up in a ball and cry. In a different room than Ben of course, because he had a great time. We played Smoke, Smoke, Fire (Duck, Duck, Goose), read books about fire fighters and fire safety, and watched a video about a fire fighter and his equipment. At the end, the boys got fire fighter badges and free time to just play.
Sounds like a pretty normal, somewhat educational preschool experience, right? Now remember that there are FIVE of them, and they are all BOYS. I also had a little screamer named Caleb who wanted to be held the entire time. I had to hide the trains, keep attention focused, make sure no one cried (too hard, anyway), and keep them all in a similar condition to when they arrived. That is EXHAUSTING work! I don't know how teachers do it!
So, in two weeks I am in charge of the letter H. Any ideas? Or ways to keep my sanity that don't involve chairs and duct tape?

A Few of My Favorite Things

2010-09-30T09:09:00.000-06:00

Nadia has become quite the mama's helper. She wants to help me make dinner every night, and not just set the table. She wants to brown the hamburger or cut the tomatoes. I'm having a bit of a hard time telling her she is still helping me even if it's just putting the frozen broccoli in the microwave, but I love that she wants to learn and help.

Brandon had a lesson on Sunday about our talents. He told us all about it after church, as well as how he wants to work on some talents this week. What does he want to work on? Shooting marbles and card shuffling.

I killed a spider this morning. After the carnage was over, Benjamin asked if he could flush it down the toilet. I said yes. Then I heard this: "You're going down, Spider!" "I will flush you!" He was respectful at the end by refraining from any evil/bad guy laughter, but it still made me giggle.

Caleb has decided that yelling is very good entertainment for the rest of us. But he is such a cutie with that little tooth that it doesn't matter.

24

2010-09-23T16:03:00.001-06:00

Have you ever seen the show "24"? Cliff is watching it during lulls at work right now. He tried to get me interested as well, but I can't get over the president being the All State Insurance guy. I keep waiting for him to be in some tense meeting and ask everyone at the table if they are in good hands. Not the best thing to be thinking during a prison breakout that includes the man who you tried to kill before he plunged his country into anarchy. Anyway, the show is about a guy named Jack and all the crazy things that happen to him during a 24 hour period as a member of some CIA/FBI/security thingy. The other reason I can't watch it is because even though Jack may have a bad day now and then with a possible nuke attack on LA during the Oscars, my days are much more challenging in general. Take yesterday, for example.

0600-0700 Sleeping and then waking up. Okay, so maybe this hour wasn't the most hectic, but while waking up and going over my to do list, I realized it was going to be a busy day. On the other hand, since I am NOT a morning person, this is probably the most panic-filled hour for the rest of my family.

0700-0800 Get kids and myself ready for the day and out the door for school. Get the boy I babysit every day. Plan a trip to the library, and do the dishes sooner rather than later because there is a smell in the kitchen. I bet Jack never has stinky dishes.

0800-0900 Realize that Caleb may not be cooperative to any plans I have set for the day. We are on the 3rd feeding of the morning, and have had pears with oatmeal. Hope the boys don't mind watching Backyardigans while I take care of the baby. Wonder what is upsetting my allergies so much.

0900-1000 Discover that the boys are puppies named Bolt and Mcgowski. Don't ask. Become a puppy trainer and feed them fruit snacks for properly performed tricks. Is that weird? Get the library books and a few of ours ready to return to the library.

1000-1100 Get custody of my parents' dog, Sampson, who is part Basset Hound and part drooling vulture. Put dogs in back yard, buckle kids up, and head to library and park. Go to story time, where we hear stories about owls and make owl faces. Find books not related to owls in any way and wonder if Jack has tried hooting repeatedly like an owl to get info from terrorists. It could be a great way to do a "safe" interrogation.

1100-1200 Finish up at the library, retrieve the books from home (thank you, observant library lady!), and come home to start lunch. Wonder why the kitchen still smells funny after dishes are washed and floor was mopped just yesterday.

1200-1300 Eat lunch with boys, some of whom are more patient than others. Yes, Caleb, I am calling you out. Wipe down counters and cook top to see if that gets rid of smell. Read new library books and get ready for quiet time.

1300-1400 Quiet time. Not that it is, really. Ben refuses to lay down. Boy's mother comes to get him and my youngest two so I can take the dog to the vet. Try to think of ways to pay for vet visit if over $200, and is dog really worth it if it costs $2,000? Hear pres/All State guy say that she's not in good hands.

1400-1600 Take dog to vet. Feel like a terrible person for not loving my dog enough, but let's face it, we have a LOT of other expenses and the dog is way at the bottom of the list. Fill out forms, wonder if I am bad because I don't know if she's allergic to anything, and try to get her to step on the scale. Visit goes down hill really fast after that.

1600-1700 Get back from vet. Had no idea the dog could shed that much. On me. She just has a cyst, probably nothing serious, we just need to keep an eye on it. Pick up kids, get them started on homework and chores, am amazed they ask for a snack after seeing them eat popcorn at friends' house.

1700-1800 Benjamin is not potty trained. Wonder if Karma is blog-stalking me, or if Ben is just trying to get even after I fed him peas last night. Caleb soldier crawls to the lamp and knocks it onto himself. Take care of Caleb first because he has a possible head injury and is crying louder. Ben falls asleep on the couch.

1800-1900 My hero arrives. It's not Jack. He takes care of dinner, asks why the kitchen smells funny, and moves the fridge to see if there's anything behind it. I clean up Ben and the bathroom. After eating, I start to get a fruit plate ready for Book Club. One of the dogs vomits. Cliff cleans it up.

1900-2030 Book Club. My darling husband takes the kids downstairs and distracts them for me. Except for Ben, who decides that the ladies upstairs must be pretty bored without him. Wonder if Jack plays Halo or other violent games after wrestling with mass murderers and other crazies at work.

2030-2100 Get kids in bed and try to keep them there. Watch a show on Hulu.

2100-2200 Wonder why on earth I am still awake. And why don't I have a Cherry Coke and some chips? Watch another show.

2200-2100 Finally go to bed, but not to sleep. Already starting on tomorrow's list.

2100-0600 Try to breathe, try to sleep, realize the two will not work together. Oh well. Now understand why Jack never looks rested. He has allergies, too.

Pros and Cons

2010-09-22T08:43:00.000-06:00

Clifford is on a diet.
Pro: a diet change will help his medication help him to lose weight and get healthier.
Con: a low-carb diet does not fit well with my lactose-free diet and new idea of adding more vegetarian meals like the Word of Wisdom suggests. Any suggestions for a week of meals consisting of only spinach, lettuce, and cauliflower, anyone?

Sarah has a broken filling.
Pro: being a former dental assistant, I automatically knew what it was. Okay, so just about anyone could have seen the huge hole in my tooth and known there was some sort of issue.
Con: being a former dental assistant, I have a rough idea of what it will cost to fix it. Sigh. And we just finished paying off the kids' dental work.

Nadia wants to be home-schooled.
Pro: homeschooling would be a great way to keep her ahead academically.
Con: she is still a little nervous about the changes with a new school year, and would hate to be home every day for school. So would I, to be honest.

Brandon got a haircut at home.
Pro: he didn't cry this time or tell me that Lance does a MUCH better job.
Con: he has a bald spot in front where he had been twirling, then pulling his hair. Very noticeable now.

Benjamin is potty trained.
Pro: no more diapers or expensive pull-ups to buy.
Con: he has to take a trip at least twice during Sacrament meeting. Usually when Caleb is about to fall asleep and Cliff is up front because he needs to direct the music. And one of these trips will be a false alarm.

Caleb is still nursing and refuses a bottle.
Pro: we don't have to buy any formula. And I'm hoping he sucks all the fat right out of me.
Con: he is back on a 2 hour feed schedule even with the cereal and baby food. The boy better have a serious growth spurt soon. He probably isn't sucking out any of my fat, either. The little turkey.

Twisted Correction

2010-09-09T22:03:00.003-06:00

I take it back. Benjamin is not potty trained. Entirely. He gets the idea, and usually does what he is supposed to, but tonight, he decided to let Daddy see what it is like in the life of Mommy.
While I was running to the store to get some food for dinner, since the kids really weren't in the mood for twigs and bark or my jokes, Benjamin had an accident. I tell you this with a a sort of half smile and lots of compassion for my husband, while at the same time, my heart is doing a happy dance and singing, "It's not just me, it's not just me..."
My sister and I were just having this discussion, you see. Why is it that it seems so easy for Daddies to put kids down for naps, help them eat their veggies, or go potty? Why do children give Daddies so many breaks?
Then something like today happens, and while I am very sorry that it did, it makes me feel better. Unless you are Cliff and reading this, in which case it just makes me very very sad. :(

Disgusted and Amazed

2010-09-09T16:10:00.002-06:00

Benjamin is potty trained. I am not disgusted by this in the least, but the story of how it happened is way up there.
You see, I have been working with him for a long time. I mean a LONG long longlonglong time. And the boy has the knack. It is not a good thing. I would sit him down, wait with him for something to happen, and within 5 minutes, something would indeed occur. Unfortunately, it wasn't anything to do with the toilet. It was always some one else who needed my attention, and so I had to go help. Or answer the door or let the dog out or you get my point.
Those three minutes when I had to grab Nadia a towel because she forgot one, or Brandon couldn't find any pants, or I was telling some one I really wasn't interested in weed prevention for my lawn unless it included a potty training program, were the three minutes he would jump off the porcelain (or, in this case, plastic Froggy) throne and make a run for it to do his business somewhere else.
On Saturday, Cliff was home. He saw that there was a need to go and sit with his son in the bathroom. So, he did. And something miraculous and absolutely mind blowing happened. In the toilet.
I asked him later what he had promised the Smiling Terror in return for keeping his pants clean. World Peace? A million dollars? Pie?
He shrugged and replied, "I saw that he wanted to get off, and just told him it would be fun if he stayed on the toilet and finished." Benjamin stayed on and has now joined the potty trained club. Absolutely disgusting. And amazing.

Not So Happy Camper

2010-09-06T16:01:00.000-06:00

Caleb just got a new tooth. You can barely see it in this pic.
He hasn't been my Happy Camper because of it.
Too bad #2 won't give him a break in between. It's starting to erupt right now.

Poor little boy.

4 Wheeling Fun

2010-09-03T16:28:00.002-06:00

Create a photo album

Saturday Is a Messy Day

2010-08-30T16:34:00.001-06:00

Saturday was the day of mess. Not just one, but many, and ALL DAY. And, of course, it was the day I had put all of my procrastinating hopes and desperate errands into.
It even started out fairly well. The kids and Cliff went camping for the night with my dad, and we all met up for breakfast the next morning at my parents' house. It was wonderful, and I was glad that everyone was coming back home. It was just too quiet without them, and it didn't help that I decided to watch Veronica Mars find the body of a girl in the ratty hotel ice machine. Just the thing to help me go to sleep. All by myself. In my big creaky house. At least Cliff talked me out of buying that huge body sized ice machine and putting it in the basement.
Anyway, after every one was home, I went downstairs to start some laundry and found the first mess. Water was dripping from the ceiling in the laundry room. I told Cliff, who was trying to sleep because he and a stick decided to fight all night over who had the right to sleep on a certain piece of ground, and he came down to stare at the huge ceiling paint water balloon that was forming and still dripping ominously.
I ran outside to where Nadia was both drowning and washing our dog, and told her to turn the water off. Back inside, Cliff found a bucket and poked a hole into the first big water balloon before I could take a picture of it. Yeah, I told him next time we have a house catastrophe he needs to take a picture of it first so I can blog. And maybe show the insurance people later. The man really needs to look at his priorities in a crisis.
The ceiling was still leaking, so Cliff turned off the water to the house and went online to check to see what we needed to do insurance-wise. Good to see that we would be covered, but we still weren't quite sure what was causing the leak. No laundry happened.
While this was going on, I went on to vacuuming. Hey, chores still needed to get done, right? I started on that and also started to wonder what would happen on Sunday and Monday if the water was still off. We had stinky camp people, piles of school clothes to wash, and small bladders. More small bladders would be joining us on Monday, as I have agreed to some babysitting during this new school year, and if the water was off in order to fix a pipe, what was I going to do?
So, we now have a water mess, a babysitting mess, and a floor mess because the vacuum was just moving the dog hair into neat little lines.
I was too angry to cry. We were just barely getting ahead of our medical/dental bills, and now this. I angrily tore the vacuum apart to find the problem. I checked all the filters (there are 3) for clogs, the belt, the canister, and then the entire length of the hose. Do you know what I found? A sock and a bouncy ball.
While reassembling the monster, Benjamin came up and asked me if I had seen a ball that he had "put away" in the vacuum. I think I need to have another talk about how we help with cleaning up and chores. It did give me a good laugh, though.
I came up to the kitchen to make lunch when I found the next mess. Brandon had decided to get some koolaid, and spilled. I am okay with that, but not with the whole leaving it on the floor until some one finds it with her foot. He had to clean it up.
We found out that the laundry room mess was caused by Nadia washing the dog and the house at the same time. There is no caulking or sealant underneath the sliding glass door that goes to the back yard. Hmmm. Maybe that explains the frozen laundry room water pipes every winter. Water was turned back on in the house.
I decided to rinse up any sticky residue in the kitchen before we left to go to the Chukars baseball game. This was the final mess. There was a pinhole leak in the water line to the fridge. Brandon had spilled very little, and the rest had been from this leak. We turned off the water to the fridge and will get a little coupling piece to fix it. In the mean time, our ice maker is off. Which is just fine with me.

War of the Wills

2010-08-24T23:52:00.000-06:00

I am currently in a major battle with my children. Mind you, if you see us, it will look like everything is normal. But it is not. We may be going through the motions of every day and the carnage may not be visible, but my dear friends, looks can be deceiving. Let me tell you about it.

Nadia and Brandon are getting ready to go back to school. Now, depending on the day or what disaster has recently happened, I am either very happy or very very happy about this. Yeah, that's right. No sadness at all. These two have decided that the cool thing right now is to ignore Mom and just do what they want, and I am pretty sick of it.
I think part of the new problem is that they are nervous about school starting, who will be in their class, who the teacher is, etc. We find all that out on Thursday night. School starts on Monday.
This does not give them the right to ignore me or pull attitude, however. How shall I engage on this battle front? With the sneak attack. I have agreed to watch some good friends of theirs in the afternoon. Plus, I don't think they realize how much fun time will be cut with the beginning of school. There are only so many hours left after school, chores, and homework. What a shame it will be to let friends play with their toys or ride their bikes while mine are left to wallow on their beds. Oh, and I will make sure to rub it all in. Yeah, I checked, the Geneva Convention is cool with it. Perfectly legal and perfectly evil. I am going to break them.

Benjamin is the bane of my existence right now. Do you know why I call him the Smiling Terror? This story and the background info should clear it right up for you.
We have been potty training for about a month. I tried to get it done before my trip out to see my sis in VA, and we had made some good progress. It went a little down hill at grandma's, but really, can you blame a 3 year old who is getting spoiled every day for not always remembering to use the facilities?
When I came back, we started back up again full time, and things seemed to be going well. Until I realized that Ben will not go #2 on the toilet. I have tried bribery, treats, shown him the cool big boy underwear he can have as soon as he keeps dry all the time, and have even gone so far as to give him cold showers. This is what we had to do with Brandon, and I hated it. But it worked.
What I am really worried about is that none of these tactics have yet proved to be effective, and the other Sunday, he was quite insubordinate. Let me set the picture for you: it was the last 5 minutes or so of Sacrament meeting, and I was starting to clean up the crayons and such. Cliff was up front, since he is the new ward chorister, and Benjamin started to help me put things away. He picked up a crayon, then turned and smiled at me. Then his eyebrows went red. For anyone without fair children, this is the sign that business is about to occur. Like, within the next 15 seconds. What was I supposed to do? Oh, and did I mention Caleb was sleeping on my lap at the time? And the last speaker was still bearing his testimony? I was stuck. So instead of grabbing him by the arms and yelling, "HOLD IT!!!" as I ran down the aisle and out the door, I had to quietly watch my defeat. It was over in under a minute. We went quietly to the rest room, where we had yet another talk about how appropriate places to go do not include in your pants.
I am still stumped on a line of attack for this one. All I know is it is ON.

Tiles

2010-08-18T00:16:00.002-06:00

Oh, I am finally back. Don't ask me why, maybe it's the strain of trying to potty train a stubborn 3 year old, but I just haven't had the energy to blog lately. Until I realized that none of you have seen my new kitchen tile, and what a truly rude and selfish thing it would be to not let everyone see it. This first pic is of the tile and everyone helping to clean it, which will never happen again. It is a definite go in the "I will scrapbook everything we have ever done...some day" pile of pics.

This is the before pic. Can you see why I didn't ever want to spend time in my kitchen? Do you know how depressing it is to try to clean this, have the floor eat your mop, and after all your hard work, it still looked dirty?

This is the close up. I chose a 20 inch tile with a thinner 1/8 to 1/4 inch grout line. Yes, I like flirting with danger. In alabaster. It is the same color as the lighter shading in the tile. I really worried about those choices and whether or not they would all tie together with what we currently had in the kitchen, and almost went with a different colored tile and grout scheme. Or theme. Or thing. Or whatever. Hey, I'm a stay at home mom, not a designer.

Look at that. Absolutely gorgeous. Now if only I had the same luck with my hair coloring choices. But that is a different post all together.

And There Was Light

2010-07-18T21:38:00.004-06:00

From the Book of Sarah:
Chapter 7
1: There was, in a far off country, a kitchen with much darkness even in the summer. And lo, there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth over the darkness of the kitchen, even with many curtains opened, and Sarah did cry out even unto her husband and father about the darkness thereof.
2: And Sarah was much in luck, for they did hear her many cries and whinings.
3: There was also a wise brother-in-law who did suggest the use of canned lighting, and the husband and father did go and find and even put in the canned lighting.
4: And there was light.
5: But no new cool floor. Yet.

Is It Really Only July?

2010-07-12T12:06:00.003-06:00

Boy, have we been busy the last few weeks. We had a 2 week vacation down in Utah, and got back last week. I have been cleaning ever since, but let's face it, when all the kids are home the best you can do is current damage control. Getting ahead has to come later.
So what have we done on this wild and wacky 2 week adventure? Well, to start, we stayed in Santaquin with Cliff's bro and his family. We left I.F. after Brandon's morning T-ball game. He got all three outs during the inning he played catcher, by the way. He has really enjoyed playing. Cliff helped his bro put up some dry wall in their unfinished basement, and we let the kids play. Later on, we went up the canyon by their house and roasted hot dogs and Smore's over a fire. They hiked around and threw things in the little river, and then it was time to head home. We went to church with them, except for Cliff, who sang with his mother in Delta. He headed back up to I.F. with his dad and the dog, and they all came back down that Wednesday evening.
While Cliff was working for a living, we had fun with the cousins. We broke out the Slip and Slide, went to the Red Barn for ice cream, made crafts, and had a picnic and swam at Spanish Fork Reservoir until Aunt Jennie cursed us with thunderstorms. Thanks, Jennie. No, really, it was a lot of fun to be there, and thank you for keeping us for a whole week.
Wednesday afternoon the kids and I drove over to Delta to wait for everyone else. Cliff and his Dad arrived around 11:30, and the next day cousins started to show up. We were pretty busy riding bikes, especially Brandon, who had to learn to ride a bike without training wheels in order to be in the bike parade.
He made it, and on Friday night Brandon and all the others took their decorated bikes and rode in the Children's Bike Parade. They were all so excited to participate!
Saturday came, and with it, all the 4th of July festivities. Cliff sang the National Anthem after the parade and before all the talks, and then he sang again that afternoon in the talent show.
My batteries died after the first pic of the parade, so no videos of Joe dancing to the marching bands or of the kids riding on horses. They had a lot of fun going to all the different booths and playing games. They went to see the fireworks that evening after we did our own perfectly legal small show with lots of water and supervision. My bro who works in the Sheriff's dept. in CA reads this blog.
Oh, the food, the food! We had carne asada, grilled by the grill master himself, shish kebabs, a great BBQ with Cliff's other bro, a flag cake, and I better stop now before I ruin all the hard work I've had to put in since then to make sure I still fit in my britches.
So why haven't I posted about any of this earlier? I have been exhausted. While on vacation, I had a nephew and then a niece born. I am still recovering. Whew!
Here's what's up next on the list of summer fun: the kids are going to take swim lessons, Ben is getting potty trained (we've already started and it's going MUCH better than I thought) and then at the end of the month, I am flying out to see my sis in VA. Yahooo!!!
Below are 2 slide shows to show you all the fun.

Fish Lake

2010-07-12T11:48:00.001-06:00

Make a free photo slideshow

Delta and Santaquin

2010-07-12T11:47:00.000-06:00

Scrapbook design made with Smilebox

Concrete Countertops

2010-07-09T16:40:00.003-06:00

Another milestone reached in the kitchen remodel: WE HAVE COUNTERTOPS!!! I can actually use my kitchen again! I can put things and clean things in the kitchen!

Cliff and I decided to go with concrete countertops and backsplash. Here are the results.

I really like it; it's a granite stone wash look done in chocolate with white, ivory, and black. On Tuesday we priced out tile for the floor. We are getting so close to being done! :)

Daddy's Great

2010-06-21T17:38:00.003-06:00

Ah yes, the third Sunday in June has come, and with it, the chance to treat those fathers we hold dear to wonderful gifts and treats. This year Cliff asked for a new set of scriptures and a bag with a handle. Done and done, although there is a bit of a funny story with the bag. The kids originally found another one, with a little cargo mesh pocket and compass on front, which Nadia thought was perfect since daddy gets lost at church all the time. Then Brandon saw this basketball bag and all discussion was over. Even though he prefers baseball, the kids knew he would love it and use it. And he does.
Now besides the scriptures and new case, Cliff also got beef jerky and a nap. These are required to make Father's Day an official holiday. I don't know which one he liked more, but they were both enjoyed greatly. We love you, daddy!

Cars and Camping

2010-06-20T14:41:00.001-06:00

The boys recently had two Father and Son outings: one in our ward, and the other with my dad. The first one was a derby for the the males to show how creative and crafty they are with tools, paint, and decals. This is the Sharp car, which Brandon named the Pirate Racer. Arr.
He wanted to name it Speed Racer, but Cliff convinced him to think of a name that went with the pirate theme. Brandon was disappointed that daddy couldn't make it look like the Ferrari picture he found online, and also when it didn't win every time. But he did still have fun.
Cliff was also supposed to make and bring a treat to share, and I am sure that if we looked on a chart, the results for treats would have looked a little like this: 50% chips with some kind of dip, 10% assorted grilled meats, and the rest would be something that the husband had begged and pleaded his wife to make for him anyway. We fell into the last category because I am a sucker, and made banana pudding.

My dad's ward had a Father and Son campout, and since all of his sons are in different states and he likes Clifford the best anyway, he invited him and our boys to come. Brandon was a little worried when I told him he was going on a campout, because it would be in the woods. I told him it would be all right, but he started to get a little scared again after seeing all the trees. Wild animals live in the woods, you know.

However, there were lots of fun games to play, and I am going to brag a little bit now. They decided to do a Highland Games theme, and had a caber toss (a very long and heavy log), boulder throw, etc. Cliff was the champ. And he even has the legs for a kilt, if he wanted to wear one.

Brandon was nervous until he made a friend named Johnny and found some good sticks. Then it was all okay. They arrived in time to eat ribs, made S'mores after games and dinner, and had a lot of fun. He got a little scared during the night when the wind really started to blow, but cuddled up with DanDan which helped.

Hey, I am not the one with the camera here. I just post the pictures. Maybe this was an exceptional port-a-potty. I don't know.

The next morning they had a traditional heart attack breakfast, went for a hike, and then packed up and headed home. Amazingly, Benjamin had no serious accidents or head injuries up there, and really liked camping. Brandon left the sticks there at the campsite for the next little boy to use and play with. And yes, Clifford did come up with that line so Brandon would leave them. Which he did.

Mammoth Cave

2010-06-14T21:25:00.006-06:00

Huzzah, the camera is found! Hooray, I can post with pictures! Yippee...oh my goodness, do I have a huge back load of pictures to put on here. Yikes. Good thing someone invented Mountain Dew. But don't tell my new bishop I said that.
Well, first on the list is the visit to Mammoth Cave. This occurred when Jenny and Beaner and their cute kids were here for Caleb's baby blessing. Yeah, that little tiny hole is the opening to the cave. Not named Mammoth Cave for it's size, let me tell you.

This is Braedon right inside the entrance to the cave. The kids hung out in this area quite a bit, especially after the flashlight batteries decided to die after the first 3 minutes. One of the reasons why you go for the name brands in batteries-life support machines have to run longer than 3 minutes.

This is why it's called Mammoth Cave. Apparently, some teenage Neolithic vandals kept telling their parents they were bored and there was nothing to do. The parents grounded them and to take up some time they drew animal pictures on the walls of the cave. Here's Clifford looking at one that says, "For a good time call..." WAIT A MINUTE!

The kids really did have a good time exploring. Afterwards, Brandon told me he'd like to explore caves when he grows up. Only they have to be light. And not have any animals in them. And no, I did not laugh and say "Good luck". Well, maybe just a teensy weensy little smirk of a smile.

I just had to end on this picture. I also need to let Auntie Marlene know that at every prayer there is some variation of "Please help Aunt Marlene to get better". We love you!

Late Night Musings

2010-06-07T23:31:00.005-06:00

So it is 11:30 at night and this is the first time since my last post that I have had time to sit and write. This is because school is out and I now have to parent all of my children all of the time, and because Caleb has decided to be like the others and grow.
I have a big problem with both of these things.
Now I have to devise some kind of schedule for all of us that will keep everyone alive and sane until school starts again, because I've already paid the fees which means they have to go back.
The other issue is a bit harder to deal with: how do you keep a child from growing up? Caleb is back to eating at least every 2 hours and will go to sleep at 11 and wake at 4 because he is starving. The obvious thing to do is suck it up and just buy some baby cereal, but then what? Let him grow more? Who will be my little baby then? And why does he think it's okay for him to get bigger, even if I've let the others?
To get off of that depressing subject, I do have a great pic to show next time of Nadia's Sunday dinner. And another of Brandon's wooden derby car. And hopefully by tomorrow evening, I will be able to post all of this and the latest kitchen update from our own house. Cross your fingers and a little nagging wouldn't hurt either. ;)

Books and Reincarnation

2010-05-28T16:42:00.002-06:00

I just finished reading "The Art of Racing in the Rain" by Garth Stein. It is a fun and sometimes sad account of a dog and his master, who are both obsessed with cars and racing. The whole book is about the life lessons this dog has learned from the race track, and using them to the best so he can be reincarnated as a human in his next life. It made me laugh. It made me cry. It made me think and look differently at my dog. Until she passed gas and totally ruined the moment.

But it also reminded me of a conversation I was part of back when I was sassy and single. We were on a big group date, and one of the guys asked what we all thought we would come back as or what we were before. It was a fun question and a pretty good way to break the ice. So what did I choose? I kept going back and forth between a giraffe or ostrich. They both have gorgeous eye lashes like me, are tall, and hate to be cold. I think. The giraffe and I also look pretty graceful until we start moving, and running can kill us. Seriously. Ostriches and I share the same skin color of WHITE and our thighs look the same.

So now I am curious: what will you be or what were you? And what are you reading right now?

The Carnage Continues

2010-05-19T18:52:00.003-06:00

Sorry it's been so long since my last post. I am waiting for SOMEONE to finish up his turn with the camera, and he is just taking his own sweet time about it. So this will just have to be a regular old post without any pics to liven it up.

You remember how I told you about Nadia's used coupon book? Well, lucky me, there are coupons that go with it! I just got them! As I was looking through to see what kinds of wonderful little gifts awaited me, I noticed a theme: a coupon for cleaning her room, one for practicing piano, several for cleaning up after the dog outside. In other words, they sound exactly like her chores. Hmmm. On the positive side, she also wrote and sang a Mother's Day song for me. So now I know when she is a famous singer/songwriter, not to expect any fancy or expensive gifts. I'll probably get a coupon saying one of her people will be doing her chores instead.

Brandon has freckles on his nose, and they are ADORABLE. There would be a picture here to show you , but we already discussed this problem. And yes, his name is Cliff. Anyway, the summer really brings them out, along with little girls who think he is cute. I am just thankful that he doesn't understand why all the girls chase him during recess yet. And that he is a very fast runner.

Benjamin and I are having a hard time. He has a hard time deciding, and I have a hard time making time stand still while he is deciding. Yesterday, we went to the store to use the rest of his birthday money from Aunt Marlene. He told me he wanted a Gordon train that was smiling. Then he showed me the Gordon smile several times, while saying, "Yike dis, Mama, Gordon need smile yike dis." Once I get the camera back, I will take a picture and show you. We found the Gordon trains only to discover that while they were all smiling, they were all smiling the wrong smile. "No, Mama, not yike dat. Yike dis," and there was Ben's Gordon smile to compare it to. He was right, the two smiles weren't the same. So what did we do? We sat there for half an hour while Ben looked at other trains, and decided they weren't right, either. Thomas and Percy were in the running for less than a minute, but James was right out of competition. Not that I blame Ben for that, James is a little vain and smug for my taste. The rest of the time was spent just sitting there, I think in the hopes that the right Gordon with the right smile would come puffing by at any moment, and say, "Hi there, Benjamin! Sorry I'm late, but here I am! Buy me!" We finally had to leave, and exited the store with the wailing of, "I want my Gordon! I want my toy!" Walmart has very good acoustics, by the way.

There should be another picture right here to go with Caleb's little blurb, as well. He has just found his toes, and you need to see the look on his face when he is watching them. His smile keeps getting bigger and better every week, too.

Well, that was a pretty good recap of the last week or so. I will try to do better about updating and nagging Cliff, so there will be a few more posts on here. That's it for now!

Happy Mother's Day!

2010-05-10T15:10:00.003-06:00

Here's how Mother's Day went down at our house. Every gory little detail.

It started the night before with me waking up every time the neighbor's cat meowed in our yard. This cat hates me, and knows that we open the window in the bedroom when it starts to get warmer. Yes, I know some of you are laughing at this sentence, but just remember that "warmer" is relative. Moving on. Every time I hear this cat, I snap to attention, and quickly try to figure out who is crying. Then I realize it is just the cat, and mumble ways to get even with it while I try to fall back asleep. Skipping to the end, I woke up with a monster headache, and Cliff telling me the kids were fed and getting dressed and he needed to go set up chairs for church. I love that man.

So I skipped church and tried to reason with myself that it was okay to take more than 2 tylenol for nasty headaches, but didn't do it, because I am nursing and feel guilty. It was a good thing that I stayed home because Caleb had sour stomach all day, and Brandon wasn't feeling well, either. We stayed in my room and watched a movie, then had quiet time until the others came home.

Oh, the presents. I loved this year's bootie. Or is it booty? This year's haul. How about that.

Nadia made me a used coupon booklet, so I now have a place to store all those coupons I've used at various places. I didn't have the heart to tell her most places keep the coupons so you won't use them again. She also made a mug at school, with a packet of hot chocolate in it. Too bad she forgot to tell the teacher I'm lactose intolerant. Eh, the kids and Cliff enjoyed it, so it worked out just fine.

Brandon made me a recipe card holder. It holds about 5 cards, and he showed me where he wrote his name on it, and how he made it look CRAZY.

Benjamin gave me a flower, and then took it back so he could sweep with it. Yes, it did make a very good broom.

Cliff made me scrambled eggs and toast for lunch and fed the kids. Very sweet. Later, we got a call from my dad that dinner was ready, and headed over to visit with him and my brother who is done with school for the summer. Dad made a lovely beef stew in the crock pot, and my bro made brownies. Then everyone else went for a walk while Caleb and I had some quiet time alone, and then we just visited until it was time to come home.

I loved this Mother's Day. I love being a mom. Even when it means I wake up 7 times a night because of a stupid cat that I think is a crying child, even with sour tummies and cranky toddlers, I love my kids and all the things that being a mother to them entails.

And here's to all the great moms I know who put up with craziness and noise and messes because that's part of the package, and do it with grace and a smile. You are wonderful, and I am glad to know you all and learn from you!

Sweet, Sweet Memories

2010-04-24T10:57:00.004-06:00

The other night, this is the happy picture I saw: Cliff and the two boys playing a game together. I thought how wonderful it is that Cliff takes the time to play with them both inside and outside, and what wonderful memories the boys will have of their "Daddy Time".
Then I hear this little nugget:
"Do you see what I did here?" Cliff asked Brandon. "This is what's called a 'Kill Zone'."
Now doesn't that just warm the cockles of your heart?

Patience and Pillsbury

2010-04-20T14:07:00.004-06:00

I have just decided that I am sick and tired. Let me tell you why.
My kitchen is now clean. But does it look clean? No. And it is not because of children, either. It is because my kitchen is half torn up and half put together. This is a very confusing look, and a very hard one to clean.
I have naked counter tops that can't come into contact with grease or water, because the particle board will soak them up and we won't be able to lay down the final counter top surface. So what can you put on a counter top that can't get greasy or wet? NOTHING.
My floors are made of textured laminate covered with glue ridges. How do you keep that clean? You have to sweep, then vacuum, then mop, and hope no one needs the kitchen for the next few hours while it dries. And then clean up any residue left by your sponge mop from staples pulling it apart. It's a very vicious cycle.
Now, before I go any further, I need to make one thing clear: this is not Cliff's fault. Okay, maybe it is, but it's because he's responsible both spiritually (his calling) and financially. Cliff has no time to put up what we do have and we have no money to buy the rest of what we need. When we do get what we need, there are often miscommunications about it. Like how I said a spice cabinet would be nice, but just as long as the upper cabinet fit, I wasn't very picky. This turned into, "You WILL make a spice cabinet and have it done YESTERDAY!!! I WANT MY SPICE CABINET!!!" They were too scared to call back and tell us one wouldn't fit.
But fear not, dear readers, this is not a venting session. I have found a solution.
Do you remember a few years ago when people were talking about sponsored events? Like having a wedding paid for by Tylenol or Rubbermaid and they paid for everything? That's right, I am going to find someone to sponsor my kitchen!
I even know how we can make the most of it: they can write their name or little mascot image into the counter tops, back splash, and floor. Can you imagine a kitchen done by Pillsbury? I will wear their colors for the next 5 years and constantly insert their name into my everyday conversation...
Okay, so maybe that's going too far. As much as I like blue and white, the doughboy could be creepy at 2 am. And really, how easy would it be to (Pillsbury) insert their name (Pillsbury) all the time? Guess I just have to be (Pillsbury) patient.

It's Not Easy Being Green

2010-04-15T17:01:00.002-06:00

I have an announcement.
I have decided that this is it. This is the year I really try to go green. Not crazy make-our-own-clothes-out-of-hemp green, but trying to think more about what I buy and how we use things green. We have already converted to the CFL light bulbs, with just a little complaining, and I do try to buy things with less packaging that degrades more easily. I am also buying the bags to take to the store and recycle the plastic bags that we do use.
But it isn't always easy being green. Or at least, greener.
Recently, I bought some cleaning products to go with our new earth friendlier life style, and I have a confession to make: I hate them. I am almost ready to go back to my role as "Sarah, Destroyer of the Environment" (sounds like some bad eco cartoon) because of them. Let me tell you why.
I like things to be clean. You may not believe this if you have ever been in my house, but I really like cleanliness. It's a good thing. For the whole 5 - 15 minutes that I can keep anything clean in my house. I also really like the smell of a clean house. Especially when it smells like lemons. It helps me to know that even though there is now a huge greasy hand print or glob of yogurt, that lemony clean smell is still there to remind me that yes, I did clean, even if no one else can see it now.
We have switched our laundry detergent, dishwasher detergent, and kitchen and bath cleaners. The "green" products I am now using to clean my house seem to do a decent job cleaning, but heaven help me, they smell terrible.
The first bottle read like a recipe for chicken: lemon, thyme, and rosemary. I was so excited. Then I sprayed. And scrunched up my nose. And made the excuse that maybe the first spray was slightly fermented or something else, and the rest of the bottle would be okay. Not so.
As I cleaned, my throat was feeling a little closed up. And then it clicked: this new cleaner smelled like those nasty throat lozenges my mother gave me when we had sore throats as children. Those huge green horse pill looking things that tasted so bad you couldn't wait for the things to numb your whole mouth and throat just to get rid of the taste. When I was growing up, you never told my mom you had a sore throat, no matter how hard it was to swallow, because you would have to sit there and suck on one of these things, and think about how much better it would be if you had just lost a limb or had the Plague instead.
I think they were Sucrets, and I think they went out of business because parents banned them along with castor oil.
So now my house smells like Sucrets and is giving me nightmares. There is only one thing to do. And that is to say I'm Sorry. I am sorry to all the wetland animals and endangered species that I will be killing (again) when I switch back to my regular cleaner.
At least I won't have to see them every day and will be able to cocoon myself in the house. My nice, lemony clean house. MMMM.

Spring Break. Really.

2010-04-13T11:10:00.008-06:00

You have no idea what Spring Break was like for us. Really.
First off, isn't it supposed to be warm? Especially when you head South? Instead, we drove through Snow from Tremonton to Santaquin, and woke up to 4 inches of snow. Really.
Second, what idiot mother forgets to check the weather down there and only packs short sleeves and no heavy clothes? Me. Really.
At least we got to celebrate birthdays with everyone. 5 of them within 4 weeks, 4 of them within 2. Really.
Julia (my mother-in-law) made cakes for 4 of the birthday people, and really went all out for them. They were all from scratch, and included a real strawberry cake and a candy bar cake. Absolute heaven. Really.

We ate cake(s) after almost burning down Beaner and Jenny new house. Really.

Note to everyone: do not light roughly 150 candles and THEN sing the Happy Birthday song. Really.

After getting to Delta, we decided to hurry and do some Easter things before the snow came. We dyed eggs, and while the children finished that up, I lobbed eggs out onto the lawn for the Hunt. I throw like a girl. Really.

We also tried to look at bigger SUV's while down in Utah, because we have discovered that ours is too small with a 4th child, a dog and luggage. Really.

No one had anything that was bigger; we should have come in two weeks ago. Really.

We also watched Conference and ate lots of candy and other bad things for us. There is a slide show underneath this post for all the other pics that didn't make it here. Really.

Spring Break Pics

2010-04-13T10:41:00.001-06:00

Make your own free digital slideshow

Latest Happenings

2010-03-23T14:05:00.005-06:00

Last week was busy. I took the 2 older children in to have their cavities "fixed", Clifford had his week full of singing and finishing up the Spring term of Sounds Choir, mud has finally come to the back yard and into the house which signifies Spring (at least I tell myself it's mud), and we are getting all the details ironed out for our Easter Trip down to Utah.
Some things of interest:
Nadia decided she wants bangs again. So Nadia and I had a girls' afternoon and had haircuts. Long story short, I will never complain about my lack of hair cutting abilities again. Her bangs remind me of when Nadia was 5 and decided she needed to cut her hair by herself for Aunt Lauren's wedding. At least they will grow out, and she seems to think they look fine. She decided she wanted bangs again because then I don't have to fix her hair every day. She can brush it out all by herself. How unfair is that? I only get one girl, and she won't do girly hair. Sigh.
Brandon has been having a hard time lately. I wasn't joking when I called him Anti-Change Boy. He suddenly decided that he couldn't go to school or Primary without a Sharp (Mom, Dad, or Nadia) being there with him. His teachers at school noticed, and we had a chat. It was kind of embarrassing, being told that I needed to stay after so the teacher could talk to me. I told her we had a new baby at home, and the routine had changed, which I was sure was causing Brandon's anxiety issues. Brandon now has a chart that he fills every week. Every day that he goes to school without crying, he can put a sticker on the chart. At the end of the month, he gets a prize. I knew he was doing better when he got his first prize, a Club Penguin membership card for 1 month, and asked if he could go to Toys R Us and pick out a $70 remote controlled Red T-Rex instead.
Benjamin now talks like Cookie Monster. I love this stage. A few cute sayings: "Me want pay compooter." "Gainkoo" (Thank you) "Me yike pancakesh a yunch." (I would like pancakes for lunch.) Sunday, he came downstairs to get in the bed after Cliff went to take a shower. He climbed over onto Cliff's side, pulled up the covers, and said, "Ah. Dis is de yife." (Ah. This is the life.)
Caleb is doing wonderfully. Yesterday was his 2 month appt, and he now weighs 12 lbs 2 1/2 oz. and just a little over 24 inches long. He is hitting all his milestones, and the doctor thought it was kind of funny that Caleb only had eyes for me. I'm not surprised at all. He likes his siblings, and will smile and coo to them, but Mama is definitely the favorite. We used to joke that Caleb is a lone twin, because he would only sleep when someone was touching him. He's doing better with that, and sleeps beautifully in his crib now.
Our biggest accomplishment was on Sunday, when the entire family made it to church together. Never mind that we were half an hour late, we were all there. Now let's see if we can make a habit of it. Just not the late part.

Caleb's Faces

2010-03-12T15:27:00.003-07:00

My dad believes that babies don't really smile at people for the first 3 months. They simply make faces because of gassiness. Some of the faces they make simply look like they are smiling.

This isn't gas.
Not when he does it every time he sees me or one of the kids or my mother.

This is a smile.

Shell Shocked

2010-03-09T21:03:00.004-07:00

We received our tax return not that long ago, and were feeling rather flush. There was money to finish the kitchen, fix the muffler on Cliff's car, and pay off a credit card. I should have known better.
I took the children in for their dental check ups. The actual check ups were fine, but both Nadia and Brandon have a cavity. While making appointments to get these fixed, I had the following conversation with the office lady:
Her: What dental insurance do you have?
Me: None. We have a Flex Pay account.
Her: Okay, so you're paying on your own. Here's the estimate for the work to be done, but be warned that it is just an estimate.
Me: (going pale) You do realize we're just getting two small fillings, not a root canal and crown put in, right?
Her: Oh, I see that the fillings will be done on your first born child as well as your first born son. Since we usually take one of these as payment, I need to know, do you have other children? Can you have more if our estimated work is above and beyond what is outlined here?
Boy, am I bummed. Guess it's a good thing I didn't bring in Ben to discuss his thumb sucking and tongue thrust issues, or I might have to steal some fertility drugs and have triplets.

Revenge of the Tooth Fairy

2010-03-02T10:41:00.010-07:00

Welcome to another entertaining and incredibly true post, starring my amazingly energetic children and their sleep deprived parents. You may be wondering what that Sharp family has been up to for the last few weeks. Well, let me tell you.
Benjamin has become a computer genius. He can now start up the internet, navigate on to his favorite sites, and play games or find videos. In other words, he is now more computer savvy than me. He turns 3 in April. Hopefully, he waits to start his own computer company until he can read.

Brandon has had a very interesting couple of weeks. Have you noticed the change in his smile? That blasted tooth caused a bit of drama, unfortunately. It is a common fact that most children will wiggle a tooth that has become loose. What they will not do is yank on it in the hopes that the Tooth Fairy will come sooner.

I have problems with the yanking of teeth. Being a former dental assistant, I have seen the horror stories in action of people not taking care of their teeth, or causing damage by being impatient. I told Brandon not to yank. I explained to him why we don't yank. I even threatened him if he continued to yank. So what happened? After another explanation of broken roots and possible grounding if the yanking continued, Brandon went to his room. He came back shortly with a bloody mouth, hand, and tooth.

That's right, after all the talks and threats, Brandon pulled out his tooth on his own because he needed to feed Piggy (his piggy bank).

Cliff was not amused, and I was furious, especially after examining the root and seeing a little hole and crack in it. That tooth had not been ready to come out, he pulled it out anyway, and worst of all, he disobeyed.

When Brandon told us he was going to put his tooth under his pillow, I said no. I told him that the Tooth Fairy doesn't take teeth that aren't ready to come out. He was very upset, but there was no way I was going to reward that kind of behavior.

By the way, why is it that my kids believe in the Tooth Fairy, and not Santa? Another post for another time, my friends.

Nadia has been enjoying Achievement Day girls. She keeps asking me on Mondays if they are having a meeting the next day, because she doesn't want to miss any. Saturday is the Mommy and Me party, and she is very excited. Nadia is also doing a great job with piano and school, and we have finally solved the problem of finger nail biting by having a manicure day every week. Thanks to my good friend Krista for the wonderful idea!

Cliff has been a wonder. He is silly with the kids and plays with them after work, even though I know he is tired and would love a nap instead. He is very patient with me and my grumpiness, and poor Caleb's colic/indigestion. Who would have thought that the poor thing would have such a hard time whenever I ate chocolate? Of course I had to give it up, but let me tell you, between little to no sleep AND no chocolate, Karma is going to be getting a nasty email from me.

Maternity Leave

2010-02-15T13:20:00.003-07:00

I know it's been quite a while since my last post, but I have been on maternity leave. This means leaving behind nights of restful and complete slumber, leaving behind the notion that I can have a clean house or catch up on laundry, and leaving behind my sanity. Okay, so I can't blame maternity leave on the laundry situation. But it can't hurt to try. Thank goodness it should only last for another 6 weeks or so.
I had wonderful help from my mother and mother in law, and I thank them for taking such good care of all of us. Thank you as well to all the sisters out there who brought by meals and called to see if we needed anything.
Every one is doing well, and I need to post some pics of Brandon losing another tooth and why the tooth fairy would not accept it, cute baby Caleb who should have been a twin, and get some stuff on Nadia and Ben to embarrass-er, I mean include them as well...

The Arrival

2010-01-22T20:35:00.006-07:00

Meet Caleb Carson Sharp. This is the latest baby model to come from the Sharp Family factory,and I must say, a pretty nice one,too. He was born at 4:30 am on 1/22, and was 8 lbs 15 oz. I am SO glad he came 5 days early.

He is VBAC #2 for me, Anxiety #4 for Cliff, and brother #3 for the sibs. They have done a great job adjusting (so far) and this little boy will be spoiled, I am sure. They couldn't give him enough kisses on his mini mohawk. We are all glad that he is here. Do you like all that hospital bling on me?

This morning, when Cliff told the kids he was here, Nadia said, "Today is his birthday." Ben said, "Get cookies for carrot?" Cliff was confused until they came to the hospital, where Ben looked right at Caleb, and said, "Baby Carrot!" Cute story for a cute little kid, wouldn't you say?

2010-01-22T20:31:00.000-07:00

Make a Smilebox slideshow

The Twelve Tasks of Hercules

2010-01-05T21:55:00.006-07:00

Some of the great Greek myths have to do with heroes and the challenges that they have been given by the gods or the ruler of the land they are in. These include the twelve tasks of Hercules, which demand either slaying monsters or capturing some sort of article that could be considered either treasure or sacred to one of the gods.
Did you know that originally, there were more tasks than that? But not being anything more than a great Greek hero, it was impossible for him to complete them. No, these tasks were left until the Greek gods and Karma came together last week and decided that there was nothing good on television. So they decided to bring them back out, and see if Sarah could perform these impossible and wondrous feats. Let me tell you what they were.
The Capture of the Golden Pearls of Urina-Benjamin has been sick. I mean, really sick, with a temp that was at 104 last night. Cliff took him in to Urgent Care while I stayed at home with the other two and tried to convince myself that Ben did not have either form of meningitis or something equally worse with only 24 hours to live. They ruled out most things, but wanted us to get a urine sample to make sure it wasn't a severe urinary tract infection.
Do you know how hard it is to convince a 2 year old who loves his diaper that he needs to give me a urine sample? You don't want to know how many tricks I tried, as well as my mother and Cliff. So while the diapers got fuller and fuller, the urine sample cup stayed depressingly empty.
On the positive side, this has really upped Ben's vocabulary and enunciation. Benjamin has become really quite good at telling me, "I don't like the toilet" and "I wanna go out of bathroom".
Finally, Clifford came home. We decided to just give up and tell the doctor we really had put out our best effort, even if Ben hadn't.
Then, miraculously, Clifford noticed something in the bottom of the bowl. Yes! It was! Sometime during the day, Ben had left us those precious golden drops in the little toilet, and there were enough for the sample!
Clifford took this treasure and the treasured 2 year old back to the doctor, who ruled out bladder and UT infections, and said Ben's white blood count was looking much better and that he'd probably be over the viral infection in a few days. VICTORY!!!
Other tasks yet to be completed but in the works:
The abduction of Payton: okay, not really abduct, but get to know. She is Brandon's girlfriend and pushes him on the swings at recess. It's cute, but being the paranoid mother that I am, I wonder if anything else is going on there.
The slaying of the Hormonally-Overloaded Monster of Pregnancia: Do you know how stupid I feel when I cry about inconsequential things? Like when my dog looks at me funny or I can't remember what page Nadia's piano lesson is? I don't know exactly when, but this monster is going DOWN.
The Labor of Caleb: should be happening any time, but I think he's going to continue to be a stinker and just keep giving me stop and go contractions until the doctor decides it's time to get him out. But like the slaying of the monster, it will happen. Caleb just doesn't know who he's up against yet.

Holy Holiday Season, Batman!

2009-12-22T14:48:00.002-07:00

Do you remember the old Batman series with Adam West? Where they would hit or punch the villains with a big POW! ZING! Like in the comics? Personally, my favorite was always the FWAP! Right now though, this is how the week has been feeling. I am starting to wonder if we will all need a vacation after this holiday vacation is over.
To start:
Christmas was great. We spent Christmas Eve at my parents house, where I realized too late that my pregnancy and their guest bed do not work together. I slept on the couch. But it was a great Christmas. I would show you pics, but my camera and photo sharing software are holding them hostage. ZAP!
December the 26th was also very eventful, but for different reasons. We were cleaning out kids rooms, and somehow the Smiling Terror (aka Benjamin) did a head dive off Nadia's bed. Straight onto the corner of the baseboard heater. He got up, looking a little dazed, and then the first gush of blood spurted out. Both of the older kids screamed bloody murder (not the best analogy, or is it?) and so Ben started screaming. Quick thinking Mom grabbed some kleenex which Dad slapped on Ben's head, and then tried to find a wash cloth. Ben went in to Urgent Care and got one stitch, and his puncture wound irrigated. He's just fine now, thank goodness. BANG!
Sunday looked as if it would be a break from all the drama. Alas, it was not to be. Around 7, I started having contractions. At 7:30, I started counting. At 8:30, I called the hospital to tell them my contractions were about every 5 minutes, and my son could still be breech. They said to come in. Good news: contractions slowed down around 3 am, Caleb is head down, and we may be having him early. Bad news: we are not prepared. No crib set up, no bags ready, no clean baby clothes washed and folded, etc. I think this may have been a practice run to tell us that we need to get it in gear. FWAP!
Tonight, we were getting ready to go to my parents' house for dinner after yesterday's excitement. While telling the children to get on coats, Cliff and I heard a loud pop/crash noise. It sounded like someone had burst a tire outside. Unfortunately, it was Uncle John. And it wasn't just his tire. It looks like someone side swiped his car, popped his tire, and did something to his rear axle. Hopefully the majority of it can be taken of before he has to go back to school in Provo next week. POW!
I know the holidays are supposed to be memorable, but I think this is a bit over the top. I would really appreciate a little quiet now. Let's see if we get it.

Eight Is Great

2009-12-21T14:46:00.002-07:00

This is Nadia. She is the newest member of the Iona 4th ward. She was baptized and confirmed by her father on December 12th, 2009, at the Iona stake center. Both sets of grandparents were able to come, as well as Cherie, Beaner, Jenny, Braedon, Kambrie, and uncle John. We were a little worried about this, because there was a big storm system which dumped a lot of snow that weekend, but everyone was able to drive safely to and from their destinations.
I was hoping to get a picture of her in the jumpsuit that is standard issue for all baptisms in our stake, but there was never any time. When she came into the chapel wearing it, I almost cried. And not just because I am pregnant and cry at everything. My little girl isn't so little anymore, and what a wonderful thing to know that she can be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saint's, has a worthy father that could help her perform the ordinances, and that we have so much support from loving family and friends.

Baby Caleb Is Upside Down

2009-12-09T20:50:00.004-07:00

So. It's official. Little Caleb Carson Sharp has decided to follow the Sharp tradition of giving his mother grief before making his big debut.
What is it about the Sharp boys that they feel the need to cause their mothers drama? Isn't it enough that I get really bad morning sickness, lose the use of a leg from sciatic nerve pain, and have so many stretch marks that I look like a elevation map? Apparently, that's just not enough.
Today I had my 34 week appointment. That's right, folks, 6 weeks to go. I was starting to think that I might pull off a simple boy birth. But it may not be. Again.
Several weeks ago, Caleb decided I make a pretty good hammock, and was lying transverse. That felt really weird, with his head pushing on one side of my ribs and his legs kicking the other. He had stayed like that until today's appointment, when we discovered that he was heads up, like Brandon had been.
I have two thoughts to comfort and console me:
1. If he is still breech in 2 weeks, we will do an ultrasound and try to manually turn him. Right away, not 4 days before his due date, like my doctor tried with Brandon.
2. I will take a C-section over Bell's Palsy (temporary facial paralysis, and the drama I had with Ben) any day. Only now that I have publicly announced it, I will have both. Because that's the way my life works.

Brandon Is Six!

2009-12-04T17:04:00.004-07:00

Yesterday was Brandon's 6th birthday. He wanted to go to Leo's Place for pizza and the play area. He also wanted a sledding party, but that will have to wait, as all the snow is gone right now.

Actual dialogue from the opening of presents:

-Transformers! I always wanted these guys!

-Dinosaurs! I 've been waiting for those!

-Money! Just what I always wanted!
-Shirts?! Who got me shirts? I don't want shirts!

He also got a bunch of John Deere stuff that he has been very nice about sharing with Ben, and decided that some of the shirts were okay, since they had dinosaurs and 4wheelers on them. Except the two that I bought for him, because one was plain and the other just has a cobra on it. So not cool.

We made a new vanilla cake for the vanilla boy, and it is a hit at our house. You can find the recipe on the Kitchen to Kitchen blog. It was his idea for the whipped cream and strawberries. Such a sophisticated palate for one so young. We will still do the sledding party, I think, and in the mean time, we have plenty on our hands with a ward Christmas party (Cliff will be singing in a quartet, if he can find enough men for a quartet), a baptism, and having the talk multiple times with our children about how it's okay for other people to believe in Santa, even if we don't.

Slacker Sarah Rides Again

2009-12-01T21:10:00.007-07:00

So here (finally) is a post about what my turkeys and the rest of us did for Thanksgiving. I went over on Wednesday to help make the pies, only to be told that my father had already bought 3 of them and we only needed to make some pumpkin custard. He is a pie fiend, and I should have realized that he wouldn't be able to wait for us to bake them up. I was also going to bake a new very vanilla cake that sounded FABULOUS, but had to wait until tree decorating time the following week to try it.
My mother's mixer finally gave up the ghost. She originally bought it in Germany, and it is the heavy duty big brother of one of those Kitchen-Aid mixers every one raves about. The Bosch beast lasted about 25 years. Mom was able to make rolls, but they were definitely not the same.

This is a too close picture of the enchiladas that my mother makes the day after Thanksgiving, and why we need such a large bird in the first place. An 8 lb Jennie-O just wouldn't cut it for the Thanksgiving feast AND for these babies. My brothers will actually skip eating more turkey just to make sure there is enough to make the enchiladas. What better endorsement to their yumminess is there? I should have posted the recipe for them right after the big turkey day, but the title for this post says it all, friend.

Brandon made this turkey for school. He was very proud of the color pattern he used for the feathers. Yes, very organized when it comes to color patterns, but actually putting the turkey away instead of letting it sit on the table for 3 days? Not a chance. He also realized that he likes mashed potatoes and gravy. Right when Cliff decided to go on his low carb diet. Oh, the irony of it all. One boy who needs to avoid carbs, and one who I push to eat any carb I can find.

This is Nadia's turkey creation. Her 2nd grade class was given the red piece of paper with a turkey outline, and fill it out any way they wanted. Most of it is different pasta shapes, pretzels, some licorice and skittles. It was a great way to get rid of some old Halloween candy, instead of letting it sit around where I might just happen to see it and eat it.

Poor Benjamin's picture is lost somewhere, but the good news is that we finally got a new camera, so it will be MUCH easier to download pics and know they are on a memory card instead of my finicky phone. Cliff actually braved Black Friday to get it. He is a much braver (and bruised) person than I.

The Trouble With Turkey

2009-11-20T14:26:00.007-07:00

I finally bought a turkey. If I had known then how much trouble that blasted bird would be, I think I would have told my mom that we are having a nice Thanksgiving pork roast, instead. Okay, so maybe pork roast and stuffing don't quite work together. Darn it.
This is what happened.
I have been looking for turkeys for the last 3 weeks. You see, every year, Cliff's work hands out vouchers for the birds, any brand, up to a certain poundage. This year, it was 18 pounds. A decent sized feast, when you think we will be hosting my family, my parents, my brother, and my grandmother, plus the essential leftover turkey needed to make sandwiches and turkey enchiladas. Just as a little aside, I think we mainly get the turkey for the enchiladas and just share it with the Thanksgiving Day feast that happens to occur the day before.
Anyway. During those 3 weeks, I have found up to 14 or over 20 pounders. This is probably because like school supplies, everyone else in Idaho Falls is looking for the exact same thing at the exact same time, only I can't blame the turkey shortage on the PTO. Yet.
As another aside, do you know how difficult it is to hoist around turkeys in those big freezer bins while you have a basketball-sized growth right in front of you? And try to keep some semblance of control over your suddenly crazy children? I think it should be an Olympic Sport. Athletes would be required to wear weighted bellies 3 days in advance of the event, so ensure the proper amount of sleep deprivation and possible threat of leg or back cramps during the actual competition. Okay, so maybe it would work better on some Japanese game show. Only it might be to strange even for that.
Anyway. Again. Since I was having such a hard time finding the right size bird (I would have happily gone with 16 lbs if I could have found it), I decided to talk to someone about possibly using the voucher for a 20 pounder and paying the difference. 10 minutes later, I was assured it would be just fine. This occurred last week.
Fast forward to Wednesday, when I finally have time to do the "big shopping" of the week, and decided to finally use the voucher so we will be able to put a thawed bird in the oven next week. I left the house at 9:30, positive that there would be plenty of time to get home, put away everything, play for a little while with boys, make lunch, and drop off a 5 year old at kindergarten. One of these days, I will realize that I am an incredibly naive shopper and need to start the night before in order to make it to kindergarten the next day on time.
I put the turkey on first, and told the cashier about the voucher while pulling it out, and that I had talked to Customer Service last week about paying for the difference.
This is the unbelievable part. She rolled her eyes, head and her neck, and says, "Oh no. Not one of those."
Excuse me? Did you really just say that?
Then she calls for the customer service supervisor, who grills me about who I talked to last week. I really didn't know I would have to verify my story, so I never wrote down names or times. Silly me, I guess.
The customer service lady listens to my story, takes the voucher with her, and the check out process continues. While she is checking out my groceries, the cashier lady tries to tell me that she doesn't think they carry Norbest turkeys, anyway, and I should probably go back and look at the Jennie-O's which are only 40 cents a pound. She also tells me what a pain those vouchers are, and even though people will tell you you can use them anywhere, you can't. I tell her I didn't see any big Jennie-O birds, and continue to put stuff on the conveyor belt. I think I tasted blood in my mouth from biting my tongue so hard, because I wanted to be snippy and say, "Well, isn't it a good thing I came in last week and was told that you DO accept them by another cashier and that mysterious customer service man whose name, rank and serial number I should have saved."
Customer Service lady comes back, and says the voucher is fine. "But this is a Butterball, not a Norbest," the checker argues. I have already told her that the brand doesn't matter when I gave her the voucher, and it's actually written in pretty big font next to the Norbest logo, but obviously the voucher and I don't know what we're talking about, since I didn't take checker lady's advice and get 8 lbs of Jennie-O.
After she is finally convinced by the customer service lady, they then argue about how to ring up the extra amount, and how much it's going to be. I almost yelled, "How about I pay you $20 just so I don't have to deal with this any more, and you can keep the darned turkey! We're eating HAM!!!"
But of course I didn't. While all of this turkey trauma was going on, 2 elders got in line behind me. Plus I have 2 little boys who I have to at least try to act like an adult around. But I sometimes think it would have been worth it.

I'm So Tired

2009-11-19T20:42:00.007-07:00

Do you remember when I talked about "Blazing Saddles" not all that long ago? Well, there's another part that I keep thinking about right now. It's Madeleine Kahn singing "Tired" in a parody of Marlene Dietrich. Why do I have that song going through my head right now? Because that's how I feel. I am tired. Not just of playing ze game, either.

This is a picture of the children from the Halloween Carnival at school. You don't want to know how long I've had it, just sitting around, because I have been too tired to scan it.

For Halloween, Nadia was a black cat, with a black shirt, her jean miniskirt, and black leggings, along with a tail, ears, and a bow tie and whiskers. Brandon was a ghost. Yes, I know, big surprise there, and so was Benjamin. So where are those pics? They were never taken. Why? Because I am tired. And I keep forgetting to take pics with the phone because I don't want to deal with a phone sometimes, and simply forget that without it, there are no pics. So I am forgetful and tired.

Why am I so tired? Supposedly, because of the pregnancy and iron deficiency. But I am just too tired to really find out. I think it also has something to do with a little 2 year old who just had a second round of croup, and so has been sleeping in our bedroom where we all freeze but know he is breathing.

I am so tired, I am just ending this post here.

The Great Diet Dilemma

2009-11-04T16:13:00.004-07:00

Yesterday, I had my glucose test and blood work done to see if there were any problems that could be controlled and fixed at this stage of pregnancy. The hardest part of this test is drinking that disgusting sugar drink that tastes like flat orange soda in 5 minutes or less, and then not using the facilities for an hour before or during the test.

I am thinking that if women had been more liberated at the writing of the Geneva Convention, when rules for the treatment of prisoners during wartime were outlined, there would have been a section demonizing this practice, along with Chinese water torture. But I survived. I came in with a blood sugar level of 125, when the norms are between 90 and 140.

However, the blood test also showed something that my sister and I have known for quite some time: borderline anemia, that can slowly creep up and be full blown for a while. Being pregnant, and seeing the test, my doctor was concerned and told me I need to take iron supplements. Then she leaned in a little, looked very concerned, and placed her hand on my arm. "I...I hate to ask this, but..are you okay with eating...red meat?"

I have to say that I was a little shocked by this, as it was the way I would expect her to ask if I knew I was carrying alien twins that would someday take over the world. She was really doing her best not to offend me when asking if I eat read meat. It took me a minute to reply that I was fine with it, and even tried to eat it with green leafies and sources of vitamin C to make the most of my iron intake. It's not the main part of my diet, but yes, I do eat red meat.

This got me to thinking how dieting is like asking people about religion and politics. It has now become a very slippery subject to discuss, especially if my doctor who has no problem asking all sorts of very intimate and potentially embarrassing questions, feels she has to hedge around to ask me about what I eat.

Most people I know are either on or have tried a diet of some sort during their life time. So why are we so afraid to talk about it? What's the big deal about following a diet that is so taboo? Or is it restricted to the type of diet?

I know some one who is a firm believer in the Atkins diet. He is diabetic and has been able to lose weight and lower his insulin intake. But, if you think about it, it doesn't technically agree with the Word of Wisdom. That talks about grain being the staff of life, which most Atkins followers don't eat at all in the first stage, and sparingly in the 2nd and 3rd because of the carbs. Is this why so many people are tight lipped about it when they hear it mentioned? Or do they just automatically get the image of some one eating huge, greasy fat pieces of meat, and nothing else?

What do you think? Is there really a trend to not discuss our eating habits in the fear of offending another? Do we look for excuses as to why we follow a certain diet, scared that others might be judging what we put in our mouths? Besides the occasional foot?

Jackolanterns With a Side of Sarcasm

2009-10-30T10:14:00.008-06:00

As happens in most households, once the leaves start to fall and the crisp autumn air turns tangy with the smell of woodsmoke, a child will ask when are we going to carve our pumpkin. They may even tell you how many you need and what they will look like when finished. Being the parent and not wanting to deny them this simple request, you go and find the pumpkins that will come home and be a part of your Halloween. Why? Because you love your children, and the great JOY they (the children, not you) get from having the pumpkins. See that look on Brandon's face? Pure JOY. The boy has been asking and telling me for the last 6 weeks that we need multiple pumpkins that look like this or that, and how he would help gut and carve them because they were HIS. This was about 3 minutes into the whole gutting process. He washed his hands (literally) of the project and was done.

Look at Cliff free handing the incredibly small pattern I found on the internet. This reminds me of "Blazing Saddles". Not that someone of my steady and responsible character has ever seen this movie. The sheriff tells the retired gunfighter he needs his help, so the gunfighter lifts up his hand. "Steady as a rock," the sheriff proudly points out to the gunfighter. Then the gunfighter lifts up his other hand, which is shaking uncontrollably, and says, "Yes, but this is my shooting hand."
Cliff was really worried about free handing, but did a great job.

This is for my brother. He cannot be in the room when pumpkins are being cleaned and carved due to a terrible Halloween accident involving 3 bags of candy, a ride in the car while facing backwards, and a freshly carved jackolantern. Nadia had to make a dramatic face and terrible noises every time she either put her hand in to clean out the pumpkin, saw all the pumpkin guts in the big bowl, or saw anyone else cleaning out the pumpkins. She was done after 5 minutes.

Here is Brandon's finished product, courtesy of Cliff's cleaning and carving. Brandon chose the face and told Cliff he did a good job. I remembered after the carving and setting it outside in the wind why I don't do candles in jackolanterns, but it was too late. Tomorrow night, glow sticks, baby.

This is Nadia's finished jackolantern. I cleaned and finished carving it. While hefting around my own pumpkin-sized self. It takes talent for that, folks. Both jackolanterns turned out well, which means no kids cried and told me I did it all wrong even after following the pattern (that happened last year). No easy Dremmel drills for us. Those are for wusses and incredibly smart people who remember they have a Dremmel before finishing all the detail work. Just a good old fashioned kitchen knife to hack away with while chanting, "Never again, never again, never again..."

Nadia's Birthday, Part 1

2009-10-27T17:21:00.006-06:00

This is Nadia May Sharp. She turned 8 on October 25th. Do you think she is excited about it? She is wearing her new Sunday dress, with the brown leggings that I didn't know were see-through until she wore them on Sunday. This is why I should not EVER try to buy trendy fashions for any one.

Here we have Nadia making the gift pile. Do you think she might have been spoiled? Maybe. This is the breakdown of the loot (as I remember it):

1.her own library of the Serendipity books (I remember reading those :) !)

2.a triple combination and Bible set

3.a new journal, pens, and a bookmark

4.a Nancy Drew early reader (for elementary age reading)

5.a gift card (WE LOVE VANILLA!)

6.Legos

7.and...

Barbie clothes. That's right, all you reality runway and model shows, you better look out because Barbie is BACK.

We are doing the friend birthday party this weekend and will have more fall updates next time!

Alas, Poor DanDan, We Knew Thee Well

2009-10-20T15:33:00.002-06:00

While having dinner at my parents' house the other day, the conversation turned to why I no longer live with my parents. We told my children that when you get older, you might get married or just feel old enough to be on your own, and that was okay. It is always nice to know that you can see your parents whenever you can, and that they still love you, but when you're an adult, you start to want your own space and your own family. Then my dad stressed that it was important to know it is always good to visit and see your parents and siblings and maybe grandparents, too. Yes, I think empty nest syndrome has been hitting them hard, but grandkids seem to help. Then comes this little jewel:

DanDan: "Would you still come and visit me when you get older?"

Nadia: (shocked look on her face) "No way! You'll be dead!"

He just turned 58.

No Tricks, Just Treats

2009-10-19T15:50:00.005-06:00

Every year, the YM and YW in our ward do a special Halloween treat night. They make all kinds of goodies under the name of the Halloween Phantom, and deliver them to different houses in the ward. Nadia and Brandon love this idea, so we have our own family version of it. We make lots of treats and deliver them to our neighbors and friends. As you can see from Ben's face, he thinks this is a great idea.

Once again, Brandon decided to make a terrible tower of candy corns cupcake. His words, not mine.

This is Nadia's cupcake. To the untrained eye, it might look finished since it has a healthy dose of sprinkles on top. But then, this would mean you don't know the Queen of Bling, aka Nadia.

Aaah, much better. Don't worry, we are not finished with the fall festivities yet. We still have Nadia's birthday (I can't believe she's EIGHT!!), Halloween, and lots of other fun things before we get to another frigidly cold winter.

Hooray For Home Schooling, Part 2

2009-10-15T15:26:00.003-06:00

Okay, I have a confession to make. This is hard for me, so please, silence until I get it off my chest. I am afraid of school secretaries. This is another reason why home schooling looks attractive at the moment, and actually the biggest reason why I was so scared I had lost Brandon's shot record.
Some of you may ask, "What are you talking about, Sarah? Why are you scared of a secretary?" First, I say to you, she is not a secretary, she is the SCHOOL secretary. Big difference. Let me tell you, there is something very intimidating about a lady answering the phone, sending a fax, and filling out a tardy slip all at the same time. "What is the reason for the tardiness?" My mouth always turns to mush when she asks me that question. I never seem to have an excuse that's good enough, either.
Mind you, we are not a perpetual tardy family, at least not when it comes to school. The problem is we have the occasional late start in the morning, the doctor is running late, or someone is sick and slowing things down. We have never been over 10 minutes tardy.
None of that seems to matter when she asks you the question, "What is the reason for the tardiness?" It doesn't matter that your youngest was up all night with a fever and congestion and finally fell asleep 10 minutes before the start of school on the stair step. It doesn't matter that the contractors who are measuring for your counter tops are still talking and measuring your odd lazy susan cabinet that isn't standard in any way, shape or form. It doesn't matter that you were actually on time until the local stray cat came darting out from underneath a parked car, and you had to stop and check the damage. These are all merely excuses, not reasons for a tardy. You need a REASON.
This was my biggest fear in losing that shot record; having to face the school secretary and hearing her ask that dreaded question, "What is the reason for losing the record?"
I had to go and talk to her today because the school website still has all of last year's information and I needed this year's in order to ask Brandon's teacher a question. Do you remember that scene in "Oliver" when that poor, thin and wretched soprano of a boy finishes his disgusting gruel, comes up to the counter that is too tall for him, and asks, "Please, sir, may I have some more?" That is how it felt to go up to the window and talk to the fearsome school secretary. Benjamin was with me for cuteness factor and support, and I was able to ask my questions and get the information I needed without a crack in my voice or have anyone asking me if I have restless leg syndrome because my legs were moving while the rest of me was stationary.
Ben and I made it. We may survive it if we have to go again. Which we will have to do, because unfortunately, some of the info I need is wrong. I will let you know when we go to brave the den of the fearsome school secretary again, and ask you to cross your fingers for us. I'll need it.

Hooray For Home Schooling, Part 1

2009-10-15T14:10:00.005-06:00

Just so you all know, I do not home school my children. Yet. But after the problems I have experienced yesterday and today, I just might. Maybe by ranting about it, I will feel better and that urge to yell at administrators will go away. We'll see.
Yesterday, I received a call from the school telling me that Brandon doesn't have a copy of his shot record in his file. I needed to find is ASAP and bring it over to them. So I go to look in my handy dandy purse, which is like the magician's hat and holds EVERYTHING. Seriously, it holds everything. There is a pocket in there just the perfect size for immunization records, and just a little too big for temple names. But that is an entirely different blog post.
I look and find Nadia's record, Benjamin's record, some dumdum lollipop wrappers, and the receipt for some pants I bought someone over a year ago. Brandon's record isn't there. So I look in all my other purses, which all have that same convenient pocket. 20 minutes later, while cursing myself for having a purse fetish and deciding which half need to go to DI, I still haven't found that yellow paper. I start to get worried, because it also has his social security number on it, and if I accidentally left it somewhere, like a doctor's office or the school when I made the first copy so I could register him, I am in big trouble.
Now, some of you may ask why this is such a big deal. The doctor's office has a record there, and it would be easy to go and fill in a new one. Oh ho, not so. I would be labelled as THAT mom. You know, every time something came up like I wanted to start a preschool or get a new job, it would be dragged out into the open.
First Lady: "Yes, everything seems in order here...wait a minute. Does it say that you lost an immunization record here?"
Second Lady: (gasps of terror)
Sarah: (nodding my head in shame) "Yes, it does. I was hoping by typing it so small, it would escape your notice."
First Lady: "Well, we certainly can't have anyone with your lack of morals and organization in such a high position of responsibility. You may go now."
Second Lady: (shaking her head as I leave) "And she seemed so nice. What a shame."
First Lady: "Yes, but remember that even the nice looking apples can have rotten cores."
It is now time to pick up children and wake up Benjamin. I say that in reverse order, because I hate to wake up Ben. He is like me, and doesn't wake up easily or prettily. After fighting him that we really do have to go, staying is not an option, and yes, I will carry him to the car, I go and wait for the other two to get out of school. Which means I also have more time to worry about this lost record and the damage I have done to poor Brandon that will last his entire life.
While sitting there waiting for them to arrive to the car and wondering how much it will cost to replace Brandon's entire identity, I try to remain calm and think where else I need to look.
After picking up kids and getting back to the house, I start rifling through folders in the filing cabinet drawer, on the bookshelves, and then start looking in the desk drawers. I finally found it in the bottom of my drawer, in an envelope along with all the other information needed for his school registration, like his birth certificate and proof of address.
Oh, what sweet relief to know I wouldn't be labelled as the mom who lost her child's shot record. I really don't know if I could have lived that down. Especially since I can no longer eat Haagen Dasz and dark chocolate truffles with abandon. You see, I gained too much weight this month. But that is another blog post and tragedy all unto itself.

Hormone Hating

2009-10-10T14:57:00.003-06:00

Can I just tell you something? I hate hormones. I really do. Especially when I am pregnant and they seem to make life so much harder than it really is. I know why they are there, I know what they all do, because I am a freak that way and have to know everything, but they can sure be a pain. Literally. Let me give you some examples.
Did you know that hormones can make your nose more congested than normal? And that they can also cause blood vessels to swell and rise closer to the surface? Did you know that I have both symptoms, and so every time I sneeze or try to blow my nose, I end up with a bloody one? Really gross, and not attractive in the least on date night or in the middle of church to have a bloody wad up your nostril or in your hand.
Hormones also put you on that lovely emotional roller coaster that makes you cry at everything. Do you have any idea how much I hate crying? Especially right now, with my nose spurting forth who knows what? I have to take at least three tissues with me to get through any kind of testimony meeting, movie, or children's show.
Those awful little hormones also attack your self esteem. That's right, as if women didn't have enough issues without them. Not only are you gaining weight at an abnormally fast pace, along with everything in your body swelling out of proportion, hormones have to come along and make you feel even worse than you normally would about it all.
Last week, my dad was talking to one of my brothers on the phone. This brother lives in CA, and so doesn't get to see us very much. They talked about the weather, sports and fantasy sports, and of course they talked about what was happening in all the families.
My brother asked about us, and if I was looking pregnant yet. My dad replied, "Oh, she definitely looks pregnant." With my hormonally crazed mind, I didn't take this as "Yes, you can definitely see that cute little pregnant tummy now." I took it as, "Son, you live by the ocean. Have you ever seen a beached whale that's been sitting there bloated in the sun for 3 days? Imagine that whale about to give birth to twins, and that's your sister."
It took a lot to calm me down and convince myself it was all in my head. I do look pregnant, and that is a good thing, since I really am. And if it takes a half gallon of Haagen Dasz liberally sprinkled with dark chocolate truffles to help me keep this perspective, then all the better, I say.

Deck The Halls For Halloween

2009-10-08T16:43:00.005-06:00

Here at the Sharp house, we are having a heel clicking time getting ready for Halloween. Just look at how happy this skeleton is to be celebrating with us.
This is what the kids wish we could do to our house for Halloween. I say no, because I know I will be the one who has to clean it all up. Three pumpkins, and that is the limit.

I think this is the kids' favorite decoration. It is part of a mobile and you have to duck under it every time you want to go into the kitchen or down the hall. Sorry I couldn't figure out how to turn the picture around.

We have more that are up and will be going up in the next week or so, and I am sure we will be doing the Halloween Phantom later, too. We are also planning on going to the pumpkin farm again, and I am positive that there will be ranting and raving and gnashing of teeth as I try to figure out how to make the Halloween costumes for the children. So much to look forward to!

Nadia and Corey Bear

2009-10-04T20:20:00.003-06:00

Nadia had the chance to bring home Corey Bear for the long weekend. Who is Corey Bear? He is a bear that all the second graders in Mrs. Ferguson's class get to bring home for a weekend. The student then journals about what they did with Corey Bear that weekend. This is a picture of Nadia and Corey Bear after we made a cootie catcher Wednesday afternoon. They told us our fortunes with it.
On Thursday, they watched Monsters Vs. Aliens and played legos. Later that evening, they helped deliver some cake to our neighbors (no ice cream).

Corey Bear and Nadia played outside on Friday with her brothers. They also blew bubbles. Saturday was really busy, because we watched General Conference and then Nadia took Corey Bear with her to get a haircut. Don't worry, Nadia was the one to get the haircut. After that, everyone went to the park to play, and then Corey Bear drove all the way to grandma's house. That was pretty funny.

Sunday was more General Conference, where they played Conference Bingo. It was also Dan Dan's birthday (Nadia's grandpa). They made a card for him and sang Happy Birthday. Nadia and Corey Bear had a lot of fun together!

Code In By Doze

2009-10-02T11:13:00.002-06:00

Ah, the season of coughs and colds is upon us once again. Or actually, upon me. If you haven't figured out the title yet, it's "Cold in my nose" which refers to my current state and I am sure to the state of my children sometime this winter.
While sipping my hot lemon tea this morning and deciding if it was worth taking any medication, or calling the doctor's office to see if I can take medication, I started thinking about my children and their love of all drugs. They cannot wait to take vitamin C when it starts getting nippy, and the older two will even fake a stuffy nose or cough just to get a dose of something. I started thinking of writing a letter to the pharmaceutical companies, and it would probably go something like this:

Dear Giant Pharmaceutical Company,

I am the mother of three children who are hooked on your products. Let me tell you why. My children think you have medicines that taste better than candy. In fact, they prefer a dose of your stuff to most candy, and who wouldn't, with choices like sour apple, berry medley, grape and watermelon. I am sure this is just a big oversight on your part, and you had no idea that children love your products so much. I would like to help fix this problem by suggesting some new flavors that children love, but are not related to candy or purple stain issues.
The first flavor I think you should consider is macaroni and cheese. Every child loves this classic dish. You could make it with either no color or a very light yellow so it looks cheesy delicious. Another good option would be chicken nuggets with a slight ketchup aftertaste. If you could figure out a way to make a red swirl into the medicine, I really think you could have a home run on your hands with this one. Or just go straight ketchup. Red coloring would not be advised for this, however.
Getting away from lunch and dinner, another good choice would be vanilla. Did you know vanilla is the most requested flavor of ice cream? Everyone loves vanilla, and you guys haven't even tapped into that market yet. I would definitely go clear color here.

The only problem with this is I do not know how to end the letter, and there are times I just want to write a threatening note saying we will never take another dose of cold medicine again. But we will both know it is just talk.
The only sane child I have is Ben. He is more than willing to throw a tantrum and spit out most of the medicine he is supposed to be taking, so you have try and figure out a redose amount, as well as rush to rinse out his shirt before it gets even more stained. Bless the boy.

The Benjamin Diet

2009-09-25T11:49:00.004-06:00

There has been a lot of talk lately about dieting and watching your waistline. This morning, I realized that I have the perfect solution for anyone who is looking to lose a few pounds.
His name is Benjamin.
Here is how the diet works. You fill up his plate, and that of his siblings. Just ignore all the whines about what they say they don't like, until they actually try it and decide it really does taste good. Then finally sit down with your own plate. This is the great part, because you don't have to worry about overloading it or getting too much of one thing. After you finally sit down to eat, Benjamin will decide he's done with his plate and that your food looks much better. He will sit on your lap with his own utensil and help himself while you try to take bites around him. I think I lose an average of 200 calories by simply not eating everything that was on my plate and fighting him to get the occasional mouthful myself.
This is a two part system, though. We all know that true weight loss also includes an exercise program. Benjamin come in here, too.
Do you know how hard it is to find a 2 year-old's shoes? Especially when he has somehow managed to cram one of them into far corner under the bed or behind a couch? This leaves the second shoe, which is usually hiding under something like a towel or toy in a room at the opposite end of the house. Results are best in a house with stairs, because you will have to go up and down them at least 3 times in order to find one pair of shoes that are the same size and match.
The only problem I have with marketing this system is that it's one of a kind. Benjamins just don't come around and live with anyone, you know.

Kitchen Elves

2009-09-23T19:44:00.006-06:00

We were in Delta this past weekend. I called my parents to tell them when we were headed into town, and then the conversation shifted to how our weekends went. My brother John came up and helped my dad with a project, which I assumed was electrical work in my dad's unfinished basement. It was not.

We came home to discover one line of cabinets in place, and a sort of functioning sink. I have been able to put away about half of our kitchen in these few pieces that are in place. The kitchen elves were very "green" and even reused our old kitchen shelf to use as a temporary countertop. Those Keebler guys have nothing on my elves.

Just Looking

2009-09-17T21:23:00.003-06:00

Clifford has been promising me a new kitchen for almost a year. The other day, he finally ripped off a tile just to see what was underneath. Then called my dad over to see what he thought, because Cliff had never seen a grooved foamboard flooring thing. This is what my dad decided needed to happen. Total tear out.

This is what I came home to that evening. You don't want to see my living room right now. The good thing is we have all of the cabinets in the garage, so not only will I get a new kitchen, I will get a garage for the winter! WOOHOO!!!

Snips and Snails

2009-09-15T14:05:00.002-06:00

Cliff and I went in for the 20 week ultrasound. We are having another boy, but even more exciting than that, he is healthy! I haven't felt him as much (which was my big concern) because the placenta is in the way, but he is strong and healthy and big.
I thought I might be a little disappointed that we aren't having a girl, but I was so worried there would be something wrong that it wasn't important what the baby is. No markers for any problems that they could see, good functions and all the right number of parts (and they are beautiful little parts)!
Now Nadia, on the other hand, might have a little bit of a problem... Maybe a consolation dinner at the restaurant of her choosing will help, or if I make a big box full of hair bows and flowers just for her. Brandon is excited, and Benjamin just gets mad when I tell him there is a new baby coming. "No! Me baby!" We'll probably get another request to send the baby back, is my guess. Until he can watch Wall-e or play trains, that is.

Super Sharp Showdown

2009-09-09T18:06:00.005-06:00

I have mentioned a couple of times that my children have superhero nicknames created by Cliff and I. What I haven't told you is that we, too, have these names and the alter egos to go with them. I am Notoriously Evil Lady, and Cliff is Justice Guy.
Notoriously Evil Lady is very similar to the Hulk, just not green. We both made the mistake of getting in over our heads, he with gamma radiation and I with motherhood. It takes a while to get us riled up, and we even give you fair warning, but once the anger comes, look out.
This is what it took to bring out Notoriously Evil Lady today.
Benjamin soaked the bed. The Smiling Terror, as he is known, was wearing a half full diaper that was on securely at the time. This and finding instruments with which to mark the walls are only two of his superpowers.
Nadia, aka Megagirl, was almost late for school. Why? Because she was tired this morning and also needed a 45 minute shower. Megagirl barely had time to finish breakfast and super sulked when I said maybe she needs to go to bed earlier if she's so tired.
Brandon was all about the schedule today. This is the way Anti-Change Boy works. How much longer until 10:30 fruit snacks? After I get dressed I can play the computer for 20 minutes, because that's what I always do, right?
The Smiling Terror decided he needed to go supervise the dog outside instead of eating, and would follow her out and lose his shoes. Now I don't mind him helping with the dog, but when he is supposed to be eating and sitting at the table, this is not appropriate behavior. The smiling terror got a time-out and started to cry.
Did you know that Anti-Change Boy has an ultrasonic whine? Since we were a little rushed yesterday and almost late, Brandon could not stop asking if we were going to be late again and if he would be in trouble. The whine had started during fruit snack time, when Ben took the wrong bag, even though they weren't open yet. It didn't stop until we arrived at the school.
After getting Brandon to school in plenty of time, it was back home to put Ben down for a nap. Then it was time to scrub the step stool that had mysteriously received large globs of kid toothpaste and were starting to dry. Yeah, those dastardly invisible villains who make huge messes and blame them on innocent children had struck again.
Benjamin woke up early and had to sit on my lap. This is when he is darling and I wonder how I could ever consider him a terror. I soon remembered after the other two came home and settled in for snack time.
While helping Nadia get started on homework, I heard a bone-chilling sound: giggling. This giggle means that the Smiling Terror has just struck again. He had splashed out a half gallon of apple juice all over the kitchen floor and table. I cleaned up the Smiling Terror again, and told him no more juice. After talking to Anti-Change Boy about what it means to be a big brother and helping to stop messes, I went to check on Nadia.
Why Megagirl is Mega? She is mega big, mega smart and mega good. But sometimes all that mega just wears down. She is in 2nd grade and reads at a 4th grade level. Part of her homework is to read every day. So what would this mega smart girl choose? Stellaluna? Make Way For Ducklings? NO. A magnet book. The kind you give a 2 year old to occupy them in church or the car. The kind that has one sentence per page, and it reads something like, "It's a sunny day. Everyone is playing outside."
This is when the children should have known that Notoriously Evil Lady was on her way. I had warned Ben and then Brandon. I now warned Nadia. But like poor Bruce Banner who tells the villain that they won't like him when he's angry, my warnings were unheeded by the superchildren.
Notoriously Evil Lady finally pushed her way out, and when Nadia decided it would be better to just be quiet and not read at all for 20 minutes, Notoriously Evil Lady grounded her and made her work on her piano lessons. Then She threatened Brandon that if he goaded Ben on to do one more thing that Brandon knew was wrong, Brandon would get in trouble for it and have to clean it up. Ben got a swat on the cushy diaper and the door was locked, making it impossible to go outside to lose shoes again. And Notoriously Evil Lady did it all with her Sinister Snarl of Doom.
Now what is Justice Guy's role in in epic battle of heroes and villains? Poor Justice Guy has to deal with the aftermath and make sure all wrongs have been righted. And get me Haagen Dazs.

Checking Out

2009-09-08T15:04:00.004-06:00

I am fed up with stores today. I am fed up with not being able to use the one closest to me, sick of not having the ads so I can shop with some idea of what is on sale, and I have had it with people telling me that the item I need is out of stock.
Let me tell you all about it.
Today I decided to go to Walmart. Apparently, Walmart stands for "Wall, you is goin' to have a heck of a time figurin' out whar we put everthin' mart."
I thought I would be okay risking it, even with the remodeling work, because I only needed a few groceries. Milk, eggs, butter, bread, juice, PB and dog food. You would think that is simple. No, it is not. When we arrived, I looked at the new store map to see where they had moved the pet supplies. They are now at the back of the store by the electronics and stationery. I think they are just doing it for the prank of having the fish right next to the small high def tvs and computer monitors. "Joe, quick! You gotta come and see these fish! You'd almost think they were the real thing and not some picture!"
I never found the bread. I looked all around the grocery area, even in the craft and sewing center and stationery section just because they may have thought it would be funny to lump the white bread with white paper or the whole grain with the natural elements bead selection.
It took me over an hour wandering around to check things off this list. I had scheduled 45 minutes, thinking that would give me a good safety cushion. Wrong again. Brandon had to get to school, so we hightailed it to the checkout lanes without the bread or PB, which is not with other condiments.
This is the part that almost killed me. How many lanes were open? 9. Not a bad number, until you realize that 6 of them were express lanes for 20 items or less. They were all empty, but apparently I was WAY over the limit since I bought the 18 count carton of eggs. So that left 3 lanes for us morons who have decided it works better for us to buy all our food at one time during the week instead of coming back to the store every 2-3 hours.
I was 5th in line, and considered myself lucky because the two girls in front of me had shampoo and pillows. They were going to be quick. The lady in front of them, however, was not. The two girls realized this, remembered that they needed something, and left the line. I was ecstatic. Until I saw how much this lady had. Then I too started looking around for some sort of escape. But there was not time and no new registers were opening.
This was when I almost started hitting my head over and over again on the front of the cart. But I am not as limber as I used to be, and couldn't quite make it.
Way-too-much-lady finally started to put her things on the belt. I realized we were going to be cutting it close for school, and maybe we would need to go to McD's place so Brandon could eat on the way to school. Then I realized way-too-much-lady's stuff wasn't moving. I looked up from the belt where I was ready to put down 6 containers of frozen juice and some cans of pasta sauce, only to be stunned with what I saw.
I was in the slow lane. You know the one I'm talking about. The lane where the cashier can't talk and check at the same time, but has to talk. The one where she picks up everything you've put on the belt not to check it, but to examine it, like she had no idea the store sold that product. The lane with the guy who picks up the object, drops it in front of the scanner, picks it up to scan it, and then drops it on the other side so he can pick it up again to put it in the bag. The person who has to plan how they are going to put your purchases in the bags and needs a time-out to write it down on the back of the coupons you just handed them.
The thing is, you cannot rush these people. You may want to yell, scream, cry, or just ask if they could hurry, but if you do, it will either fluster them or anger them and either way, they will go even slower. So I had to bow my head to defeat, unclench my teeth to say, "Fine, thanks," and leave it at that. I knew I had lost.
Brandon barely made it to school on time. He enjoyed having a Happy Meal, even if it had a girl Star Wars toy in it. And I came home to flop on the couch and wish for a Coke. They have probably been moved over next to the laundry detergent or Mentos, but I don't have the strength or 3 hours to go back to the store and see.

Brandon's "New" Blue Bicycle

2009-09-06T10:17:00.004-06:00

This is Brandon's bike. It is blue with purple accents and is very battered. That's because it's really Nadia's old bike that was just spray painted blue. Now why would sane parents give a girl bike to a little boy? I will tell you. We are cheapskates and didn't want to spend $70 on a bike Brandon wouldn't ride because it only had two wheels. Forget that it has training wheels on the side to help, this is not a three or four wheeled vehicle, and therefore unsafe to little boys named Brandon.
Then Daddy made him get on, with the usual kicking and screaming. I told you, he really is Anti-Change Boy. Once again, it was proven that Mom and Dad are really not trying to kill Anti-Change Boy, they just want to show him how fun new things can be.
Now he loves the bike, and asks when we can go ride to the park or church. Don't worry, next year he will have a real boy bike. Now that we know he'll actually ride one, we will invest the money to get him one that is boy cool. We may be cheapskates, but we're not super villains. Unless we're potty-training.

Out With The Old

2009-09-01T19:11:00.002-06:00

This is my new fridge. I am very excited to have it upstairs in the kitchen now instead of in the garage. You will notice that it is still in the middle of the kitchen; that is because it doesn't quite fit. Cliff and my brother went to a lot of work and trouble to get it up into the space and hauling out the old fridge, then tore up the chair rail and took off the top off the little counter next to the fridge before realizing that this new fridge is still too big. Something I tried to tell them, but being a girl, what do I know about measuring and appliances.
So what does all this mean? It means that I may get my new kitchen. Soon. Just so we can actually use everything again without all the hassle. Am I disappointed with the current inconvenience? No, because Cliff is also inconvenienced, and may therefore decide to finish the project. P.S. I love you, babe.

School Dazed

2009-08-25T13:09:00.002-06:00

Monday was the first day of school. The children woke up at 7 am, we had smiley faced blueberry pancakes, and the children dressed themselves and were off. Only I can't show you any of these pictures because our camera decided it couldn't survive without being next to our old monitor, and passed away as well. Those smiley face pancakes were awesome, too.
So instead you will just have to read until I can make fake first day of school pics and then post those.
Nadia is very excited to be in Mrs. Ferguson's 2nd grade class. She was Nadia's cousin's teacher last year, and we got to know her pretty well. I think she will do just fine. We have already had our first school related meltdown when she realized she had thrown away her sandwich keeper with the rest of her lunch trash. Pretty sad for Nadia, who had been looking forward to using it all summer long. Maybe we can figure something out at the store on Saturday.
Brandon has done a lot better with kindergarten than I thought he would. Just to help you get the idea of what I am up against, Cliff and I decided that if Brandon had a super hero name, it would me Anti-Change Boy, the ever loyal sidekick of Megagirl (Nadia). He just does not handle change well at all. I was very grateful to find out that this year the teachers did a "kindergarten roundup", where the parent and child got to go the the class together and do some activities. It was a big help to him to be able to meet the teacher, see his room, see where he would sit, and do some of the things that he would do in class. We also went to back to school night, where we got to drop off his school supplies and see everything again. There was no crying on the first day. It was amazing. He just got in his line at the front door, waved at me, and went inside.
Benjamin is having a much tougher time than Brandon. He is very cuddly right now, almost to the point of strangulation, and keeps asking where the other children are. When we went to drop off Brandon today (he's in pm kindergarten), he was very excited because he thought we were there picking up Nadia. He has been sitting on his pouting step (bottom stair step by the front door) and doesn't want to play with me. I have been letting him hug me all he wants, and hope that Big Sibling Withdrawal pains go away soon.

Two Theories

2009-08-19T21:01:00.003-06:00

I have two theories when it comes to school supplies and buying them for your children. What is that, you say? You don't have to buy school supplies because you don't live in Idaho? Well, aren't you just special then. I really don't want to talk about it or I might start cursing in Italian again. Okay, I have calmly counted to 10 and can continue now.

The first theory is that all of the stores in Idaho Falls have decided that adults don't have enough fun when they go shopping. So these stores got together and made a master scavenger hunt list out of all the school supplies handed out to us parents. If this is the case, I will gladly trade 8 glue sticks and one Hannah Montana Folder for 3 watercolor sets. Or 3 10 packs of pencils and 4 spiral notebooks. Or both. I just need those blasted watercolors.

The second is that the PTO (Parent Teacher Organization) is a group genius, and they have just hoarded all of the watercolor sets in the grand scheme of making us parents pay exorbitant prices for them later. It is the black market at its finest. And where would these nice ladies learn such deceitful behavior? Well, let me answer that with the following question: who do you think teaches mafia members how to keep things so secretive and borderline legal? That's right, from their moms who were in the PTO and desperate to raise money for new playground equipment.

So what is a frantic parent to do? You have two choices.
You can picket the school with the hourly threat of being killed by the "Momma Mafia" aka PTO, with the hopes that finally the local politicians will recognise the dire situation and declare a state emergency. As well as get in some good camera time for themselves. Then a SWAT team will be sent in to find and release all hostage watercolor sets. Of course, you and your family will be forced into the Witness Protection Program for your efforts.
Or you can choose to act ignorant. Maybe the teacher will never realize you dropped your kid off at school without every school item listed. Be prepared for it to backfire, just in case. "What's that, Mrs. Smith? Little Johnny doesn't have his watercolors? I was sure I packed them in with the other school supplies...Well, give me a day or two to look for them around the house." Then drive up to Canada where the watercolors are a part of socialism and free to everyone. Just don't let those Mounties catch you.

Questions

2009-08-14T16:48:00.004-06:00

Should we find out the gender of this baby? The ultrasound is coming up, and we have found out with all the other children. I know Nadia is adamant about knowing if it's a boy or a girl, but she took it pretty hard when she found out we were expecting Benjamin instead of Benjamina. Although, this little girl's name would have been "Princess Ballerina" according to Nadia. So maybe it was good we had a boy.
Should we let the children come this time and risk Nadia bawling on the way home? Or just Cliff and I go, and then gently break the news to the children so they can cry when they are already at home?

Is it better to let the children keep their own made up words or correct them right away, or does it depend on the word? For instance, we were discussing various dinner choices for tonight. Nadia wanted "portugeeyas". I'm probably spelling it wrong, but however you spell it, it sounds like you are eating some poor Portuguese person for dinner. Really not very appetizing to a pregnant woman who gets the image of some huge pot with a foot sticking out of it every time Nadia mentions it. She finally told us it means a quesadilla with tomato sauce, but I still can't get rid of that foot image.
This also occurs quite a bit with Benjamin, who uses the word "badoo" for Bowser of Mario fame or any other dinosaur, as well as what he calls his grandmothers. I have been too scared to ask either of these ladies what they think of this, and whether or not it should be stopped. Would you be offended if someone was calling you a dinosaur? Or does it depend on who it is?

Cliff is talking about going back to school. He is debating getting his MBA with an emphasis in one area, which would involve taking about 4 classes in that major. Or he should get the MBA and this major together, as offered at a different school? Also, how much does the school name matter now? Does it make a difference what you study at different schools?
If Clifford does go back to school, does he expect me to support him in the manner to which he is now accustomed while I am 7 months pregnant? Or will he decide to be gentlemanly and wait for his sugarmama to deliver this baby and recover sufficiently before sending me back to the mines?

And why can't we get any ripe tomatoes? Will they ever go from yellowish green to red?
That is probably the greatest question of all.

Transfoming The IQ

2009-08-08T12:21:00.003-06:00

I am a smart person. Really. I know I get the occasional memory lapse, but I can conveniently blame that on my pregnancy (for now). I can solve a sudoku puzzle, work out a crossword, and have even figured out Rubik's Cube. Most of the time. So why do I feel like an idiot every time I have to transform those blasted Transformer toys?
We used to have such a happy, peaceful home. And then that fated Christmas morning arrived. If only I knew what kind of damage those toys would cause. Not to the children, but to me. Brandon opened the first Transformer set and asked that they be transformed. He wouldn't open anything else until I did it.
I asked Cliff for help, since he had played with them as a boy, but he smiled at me, leaned back in his chair, and said, "This is my revenge for you making me potty train the boy."
Okay, so he didn't say that. But he might as well. What he really said was, "Babe, you're going to have to learn, because I won't be home to do it for you." What a jerk.
I have finally mastered Bumblebee, the crane guy, sporty car Decepticon guy, and the helicopter. And I did it without the instructions, because Brandon doesn't believe in keeping helpful bits of direction. But Megatron. I hate Megatron. I never really thought I would ever hate a toy, but there is a pure loathing in my soul for that piece of demon spawn.
The thing I hate most about him is that it's only supposed to take 4 steps to transform him. And I can't do it. It's like my brain stops working in between steps 3 and 4. The final product is a tank that can only fire at its wheels, instead of firing its projectile missile somewhere into the carpet that I will later find when I step on it. And it looks pigeon toed. Which is not good when you are the leader of the Decepticons and feared by both your followers and enemies. Who wants to fear a pigeon toed robot? That's right, no one.
So I am a failure. Apparently I am not smart because a toy is besting me in the intelligence department, and because I can't perform a simple task for my son. My only option is to mumble under my breath, "Wait till your father gets home." Cliff's revenge is complete.
All I can do is hope and pray this next baby is a girl, because if it is, watch out, Cliff. You have no idea what you're in for in the girly pink department.

Some Other Sharp People and Warm River

2009-08-03T11:02:00.007-06:00

We went to Warm River on Saturday with Jenny, Beaner and their two children. We all had a really good time. Here is a picture of our family in Warm River, which really isn't that warm at all, but gets its name because it is spring water and never freezes. This is also when I got my sunburn. Darn low necked maternity shirt.

Ben had to be held a lot of the time in the water, but finally decided to test it out. And loved it.

The kids had a great time playing in the water, and found slimy rocks, snails, and slugs which were actually leeches, but I didn't want to ruin the fun. So they were called slugs and I discreetly checked everyone to make sure no one took home a new "friend".

Four wheeling. The kids couldn't get enough of this. This is Nadia and Dad getting ready to head out. We took a very well groomed trail that is actually the remains of an old railroad bed between Yellowstone, the first ski resort in Idaho (now closed), and Idaho Falls. The dads later went on another trail that was not quite so kid friendly by themselves, and I am told that Cliff is still quite limber and graceful in his old age. I'll have to check it out sometime. ;)

Yes, Brandon looks dazed and delirious from all the fun and excitement. I wish I could show you pics of feeding the fish, but it never works. There is a little bridge area where you are not allowed to disturb the fish in any way. The trout that live here are enormous, and if you throw in a slice of bread, you understand what the phrase "feeding frenzy" means. Maybe you will have to visit and see for yourselves how beautiful and fun it is. We will definitely be going again next summer, and hopefully more than once. Warm River makes the Idaho winters worth it!

Brandon, Piggy and the Tooth Fairy

2009-08-03T10:10:00.003-06:00

I would have posted this earlier, but we have been experiencing technical difficulties with the monitor we bought 2 years ago. We tried reviving it, but no luck. Now it is dead. It was a widescreen flat panel, and I miss it terribly.

Brandon lost his first tooth about a week ago. And yes, the permanent was right behind. It looks HUGE in his little mouth.

Now many of you know what cheapskates we are, and one of the areas we skim in is with the Tooth Fairy. I know lots of parents (including mine) who give children a dollar when a tooth is lost. We only give a measly 25 cents. As a result, Brandon's best friend Piggy (as in Piggy Bank) has not been feeling well lately.

Apparently, Piggy is sick. And he needs more than a quarter from the Tooth Fairy to feel better. So I have suggested that Brandon do more chores to get more quarters for that poor Piggy. He took it better than I thought he would, and every time he does a chore, he gives me an update on Piggy's health. It's really quite cute.

Cliff's Birthday

2009-07-26T21:51:00.002-06:00

Yesterday was Cliff's birthday, and here is a list of things that did and didn't happen.

Did

All of the children gave Cliff cards. Ben's was Handy Manny, and we know it would work when he said, "Manny" and "Mine". Brandon gave his dad a dinosaur card. While drawing a picture and signing his name, he told me all about how his birthday party should be, including the gold dinosaurs and Transformer cake. Nadia signed one card and then made another one for Daddy during Church, complete with envelope. One small problem, no one knows how to put the envelope back on, including Nadia.

We made Cliff a chocoholic cake with Baby Ruth bars cut up on top of the whipped cream frosting. Brandon decided the cake wasn't quite ready yet and needed some fruit snacks, so they went on as well.

Cliff's birthday dinner was grilled steak, oven veggies, homemade rolls, a fruit and a green salad. The steak was perfect, nicely seasoned and very tender, and I can't eat enough of those oven veggies when they have mushrooms and asparagus.

Didn't

I still haven't gotten Cliff's b-day present. In my defense, I have pregnancy amnesia, and have a hard time remembering the children's names, let alone a book by what's-his-name Skousen about 5,000 somethings. Or Cliff's hat size for that fitted Detroit Tigers baseball cap he likes. No, apparently "Big" isn't a size. This week I need to find time to go to the store with the info written down and just hand it to someone so I don't make any more problems.

No pics for this post because I forgot to charge the camera. Not that Cliff really cares, but the children love to see b-day pics. Maybe when Aunt Jenny comes up on Thursday I will angle the camera so it looks like Cliff's b-day instead of Jenny's. Don't worry, I'll still take Jenny's pic as well. If I remember to charge the batteries this time.

We did have steak, but it wasn't what Cliff wanted for his b-day dinner. I just mistakenly assumed it was. About a month ago, Cliff was talking about a good steak, and so I decided we could do that for his birthday. Saturday night is not the time to double check to see if it's what they really want for Sunday/birthday dinner. He really wanted my mother's pork schnitzel with brown gravy and noodles. Oops.

I guess it's just a good thing that I'm so darn good looking, and that Cliff finds it easy to forgive me.

Big Scare With The Little Bean

2009-07-22T20:03:00.002-06:00

Let me start this off by telling you that I am pregnant. 14 Weeks. I am due towards the end of January. We are very excited, but I am also very paranoid and nervous because of the 2 miscarriages I have had between Benjamin and now. That is why I have waited to tell people, unless they normally saw me all the time, and were scared I had the Swine Flu or something worse.
I have a wonderful midwife I see, who decided to break her arm and not see patients for two weeks. Why she couldn't have waited until after my appointment to do this, I don't know. I was called the day before my second visit with her to hear this news, and that I had the choice to see a doctor who I like very much and knows me as a patient, or someone I had never seen before and knew nothing of my history. Trying to be nice, I said either one would be okay. So of course I get the one I have never met.
Forward to the next day at appointment time. I was late, I admit it. So I had to wait while all the other good patients who were on time were seen first.
It would have been okay to wait 45 minutes, except I was already paranoid that everything wouldn't be okay, and then there were these obnoxiously ANNOYING children who were not under control at all. Incredibly, they were not mine. Now I don't know about you, but when I tell my child to stop doing something, they either do it themselves or I MAKE THEM. That's the way it works. This lady repeatedly told one of the children to stop doing something, sat there, and then said the child's full name. And continued to sit there. Guess what happened. That's right, NOTHING. All my children do when I say their full name is congratulate themselves that their mom actually remembered something.
Finally time to go in. They thought I was there for a yearly physical. Had to change all the paperwork and exam room. Not a big deal, I thought, because they have to pinch hit for my poor midwife. Get in the room, in comes the physician's assistant, who is all bubbly and happy and excited to see me and asks if I am still nauseous enough to need a prescription. I didn't get one the first time, so why would I need it now? Do I need more progesterone pills? I almost ask, "Do you want to look at my chart?" But I am nice. I tell her that my midwife just wanted me to take them through the first trimester to help my chances of not having another miscarriage. Then she does look at my chart. I see the light of knowledge and understanding finally shine forth from her face.
She takes out her Doppler and goos me up. I hate that goo. You can never get it all off. She goes down low. Then lower. Then still lower. I'm starting to wonder if I should have had a waxing before this appointment. I'm pretty sure my knees are up higher than where she is. Then she apologizes to me and tells me she usually does the physicals, not O/B visits, and she hasn't done one this early in the pregnancy in a long time. You could have fooled me, Jack. She says she has a terrible doppler unit because of this, and will get another one that she knows works better.
Doppler #2 is indeed better, you can hear the difference. She starts down low again, but miraculously, then starts to work her way up. Probably because there was no more low to go. But now I start to get worried. #1 doppler, I think you could have landed a helicopter on me and not heard it with all the static. #2 you start to hear all the normal things, but no heart beat. I tell myself not to panic; it's a little tricky sometimes to hear it at this stage, especially if you don't do it all day every day. We do this for 20 minutes. I am getting sore because she is pushing so hard, but she is sure she heard the heart beat for a second. I hear nothing comforting.
She is very serious now all the bubblyness gone, and tells me she is going to get a doctor and another doppler. Unless the doctor says I just need to go into Ultrasound right away. Then she leaves.
For the next 15 minutes, I to try to avert my eyes from all the cute baby pictures hanging on every wall and even the ceiling, or I will cry. This has happened to me before. One normal visit, and the next, no heart beat.
After these awful minutes, one of the doctors comes in with her own machine, goos me up again, and IMMEDIATELY found the heart beat. Very strong, very good rhythm. Nothing to fear. I almost cry again, I am so relieved.
I go out to make my next appointment, at which I will make sure I am definitely seeing my midwife or a doctor, and am told the finance dept. needs to see me. I think they just need to update my insurance info. Oh no. That would have been too simple.
She hands me several papers and then proceeds to tell me how much my insurance will cover, I need to sign this one to say where I want to deliver, this is the portion we are responsible for, unless it costs more, and then we have to pay that too, and which payment plan do I want? Can I start paying at the end of this month or is August better? ARE YOU KIDDING ME???!!! You want me to prepay on my baby? Who does that? And after having all my adrenaline sucked up and used by every cell of my body during those terrible 15 minutes?
I try to call the hubby, but no answer. I am still in shock over my appointment and just sign I still don't know what just to get out of there. An hour later I am still shaking, but breathing pretty normally, and that's when I realize I really was in shock. Cliff calls me back and I tell him everything. He gets very grim and goes to see the finance lady, who gets very angry at him. He gets another paper releasing me from any and all crazy actions taken by me that afternoon, and that we will pay our portion. After the baby is here.
And that is why when you find a good care provider, you should stalk them to keep them from any and all dangers, so you don't get stuck with inexperienced physician's assistants who will only end up scaring you half to death. And why you should never go alone into the fifth circle of hell, also known as the finance/billing department. Because they will suck out your soul. And $3,450 in easy to make payments of just $139 a month FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

Staying Cool

2009-07-19T10:44:00.003-06:00

It was in the 90's on Saturday. So how did the kids stay cool? Daddy put the sprinkler under the trampoline so they could jump and get wet at the same time. Brandon even liked it, and he hates getting wet unless he can control the wet factor.

Then we went over to the g-parents house and played Wii in the cold basement and had a hot dog dinner. Perfect way to spend a hot summer day.

Frustrated

2009-07-18T10:39:00.002-06:00

The title says it all. I am very frustrated lately. I have two fantastic movies that I keep trying to download and for whatever reason, they never go through. I really was trying to show the Joseph dance he did during the 4th of July parade when the marching band came by. It was great. He would sway from side to side and take an occasional step, but not to many. He is definitely set for his first church dance when he's 14.

I am also frustrated about the whole "Princess and the Pea" thing that happens EVERY TIME I get pregnant. That's usually one of my first signs. I don't know why, but for whatever reason I cannot get comfortable in any position in any bed for longer than 30 minutes. Then I have to start the whole trying to find a comfortable spot again. Not very conducive for sleep, which my body needs more of right now. So ironic. And frustrating.

And speaking of frustrating when you are pregnant, who in their right mind tells a pregnant woman that they won't call you if the lab reports are normal and then leaves an ominous sounding message Friday afternoon so you have to wait all weekend to find out what's happening?! You just don't do that! Especially to someone like me, who automatically thinks the worst and was expecting the message that I only had 48 hours to live, so waiting until Monday to call back was stupid because I would already be dead. Oh, the results were all normal, which was almost more frustrating, because they said they wouldn't call if they were okay. I think they just like messing with me.

Why can't I grow grass? We have resodded about half the yard because it was a wildflower wonderland that was way too much work and I was allergic to the majority of it, even if I wanted to try. Now we have weeds and morning glory that keep trying to grow in under and through the sod, so maybe we will end up with the wildflower/weed wonderland anyway. Frustrating.

Today we are going to look for an AC unit to fit the living room window. We already have 2, but they are too wide to fit. So the kids can stay nice and cool in their rooms with the wider window slots, but no, they have all been sleeping downstairs in the family room next to our room. Don't ask me why, because that means trying to figure out what they are thinking, and that is a road with no end, my friend. Wish me luck on the living room AC, but I expect it will just end up being FRUSTRATING.

Conversations

2009-07-07T20:59:00.003-06:00

"I thought you sprayed Nadia."

"No, I thought you had and I didn't want to spray her again."

Now my child has about 35 bites just from 1 1/2 hours out watching the bikes in the children's parade from July 3rd.

Totally unrelated conversation next. My parents were taking the kids to watch a movie and told Nadia and Brandon how smart they were.

Nadia: "Yes, I have a huge brain. That's why I'm smart."

Brandon: "My brain is so big it fills my whole head!"

I love those smart kids.

Independence Day

2009-07-06T09:29:00.004-06:00

We went down to Delta for the 4th this year. It was a lot of fun, but as you can tell by the smiling and happy faces above, there was not much sleeping. Some of the highlights were:
watching the children's parade on the evening of the 3rd, going to the real parade the next morning, playing and buying things at the park, having hamburgers, hot dogs, and 6 racks of to die for ribs (thanks, Beaner!), and seeing all the cousins and aunts and uncles. We also got to see Cherie, which was a real treat because we haven't seen her in several years.

Grandma also bought a slip-n-slide for the kids to play on, and it sure got used. The kids were really upset when it was time to put it away. The weather was perfect, too. It stayed pretty sunny but not too hot, and only rained between dinner and the big firework show. The kids stayed up to see that after we did our own little one, because let's face it, can you ever have enough fireworks?

Some funny things I heard this weekend:

Wet guy comin' through!

VICTORY!!!

Have you seen my eyeball?

I also need to post Joseph's dance during the parade, and a few other things. I will try my best to get that done this week!

Little Funny, Little Sad

2009-06-02T15:42:00.002-06:00

So I have been really bad about blogging this last week or two because I keep forgetting to charge the camera and have dead batteries, or do remember to charge the batteries but forget that my memory card is full. Silly Sarah.

I did want to share two things, though, and they really don't need pics, thank goodness.

1. Nadia now has her own room (again). My parents were finally able to sell their house after lots of drama involving floods, radon, and a family of mice, but it's DONE. They have also successfully bought their new house after more drama, including closing 2 weeks late because of lost paperwork, loan officers who thought they owned 2 other houses, and drainage problems. All has been resolved, and all is happy in their new home on the golf course.
Anyway.
The very afternoon they left, Nadia was moving everything back into her room, and even drew a picture for me to show what she needed and where it should go. This included a dresser, bed, small heart shaped rug, new bedspread, a lamp, and a picture on the wall. Very practical as well as imaginative, my Nadia. She also asked if we could paint. I told her that would have to wait, but was curious what shade of pink she would like on the walls, since none of the other bedroom stuff in her picture was pink, and pink is her favorite color. She told me she doesn't want pink in her new room. Or princesses. She is now too old for them. I was devastated.

2. Brandon has been having an issue with whining and crying whenever he doesn't get his way, and then whining and crying when he gets in trouble for it. Today, we were out running errands and I decided that they had done so well, we could stop for ice cream at McDonalds. The kids were very excited about this, until Brandon realized we were just getting ice cream, and not Happy Meals, or more importantly, no Happy Meal toys. He started to throw a fit, so his ice cream was taken from him. He asked me why. I told him I do not reward children who whine and cry. He then looked down at his empty, ice creamless section of table, and said in a very small, very pouty voice, "When I'm a parent, I will ALWAYS give my whining kids ice cream." So hard not to laugh, but keep a sober face at him.

Mother's Day

2009-05-15T17:33:00.002-06:00

I was having a very difficult time trying to upload this picture, and I still don't know what I did differently this time that actually made the computer gods shine down their favor on me and let the image finally go through. But this is why the Mother's Day post is so late in coming.

This is the picture Nadia made of me for the Mother's Tea at school on Friday afternoon. She made sure I knew that there really wasn't any tea at all, just punch and cookies.

This is a great picture of my new haircut and color. Do you like my stripey hair? Did you see my bangs? Very accurate and true to life. Now everyone knows what my new 'do looks like.

Mother's Day was very nice. I got breakfast in bed, which was pancakes and oj. There was just a small problem when Nadia lifted up the tray which happened to be half broken, and finished the breaking. Unfortunately, this accident also included the demise of her favorite mug, and so tears were shed. But isn't that sweet that she wanted me to use her favorite mug for breakfast in bed?

I also got necklaces. Nadia and Brandon each picked one out for me, along with Daddy. Let's just say Brandon has great taste, Nadia is all about the bling, and Cliff is clueless. And I can say that now that Mother's Day and my b-day are over. Love ya, sweetie.

Windex, Anyone?

2009-05-07T13:42:00.004-06:00

I don't do windows. This is why.