Carly Simon Was Right...I am So Vain

Do you remember that song by Carly Simon called "You're So Vain"?  I am way to young to have ever heard it in the car on the radio, but I know a little about the story and have a huge pet peeve with this song and the writer/singer. Apparently it was incredibly popular and even had a huge auction where some person paid a bajillion dollars to have dinner with Carly and find out who it was that was so vain. Really? Someone paid money for this? To find out who was so vain and why they probably think this song is about that person? And isn't that song really about that vain person? There's no "it's probably about you", it really is about you, and being vain, you would think so even if it wasn't. I hate it.
But it has been going through my mind all day, because it perfectly describes me right now. I am so vain.
I went to the doctor's office today to have a 3 month check-up on my foot. He poked, prodded, we took x-rays, and I asked some questions. Then I got in the car and cried because I am a vain person.
My foot will never be cute (okay, so it really wasn't all that cute before, but you know what I mean) and straight like it was before. I have good motion in my toes, no aches or lingering pain from the accident, my toenail is growing in and looks wonderful, but all I can focus on is how I now have a crooked big toe and a small toe with a kink in it. Silly, silly, vain girl.
The scar on the top of my foot is getting smaller all the time, and is a light pink instead of the dark purple it was just a few weeks ago. It will probably fade away almost entirely, but I am not focusing on that. I am thinking about how I have a scar on the top of my foot and how it will totally out-ugly any cute strappy shoes I might have worn this Spring and Summer. Vain, vain, vain.
I no longer have any restrictions on my foot, and can do anything I normally would as long as it doesn't cause pain. Unfortunately, this means I can't wear certain shoes that rub up on my kinked toe, and probably should stay away from cheap flip-flops for a while at least. I feel like I am being relegated to sturdy (read clunky) walking shoes or Crocs. Can you believe how unfair that is? No cute sandals that might slide around while I am wearing them because they don't have any support. No, just Doc Martens and Clark's, so I will look like an out of work school teacher or just a fashion-challenged lady with my grandma shoes. Never mind that they might be incredibly comfortable and offer good all over foot support. Silly, Silly silly.
Now that it's Spring, I feel the urge to have cute and painted toe nails, but feel like I can't because my big toenail is still growing in and look super short and funny right now. Never mind that it is healthy and growing faster than the doctor predicted it would, or that it actually looks better than it did before the accident when it had a weird curve in the top. I am complaining because I can't have cute painted toes, or at least, not cute painted toes that I am comfortable with anyone seeing. Vain, vain, vain.
Not that I have ever done it before, but I had been planning on training for and competing in a 5k this summer. I thought it would be a good way to get in shape, even though I hate running, but now those plans are on hold for at least a year. Toes heal slowly, and there still isn't a whole lot of bone there on the breaks. I get told this every time I go in to see this doctor. "Toes heal slowly", "Toes heal slowly". Ugh.  Silly vain girl.
Well, enough of my silly and vain whinings. I am sure I will be okay with it all tomorrow. Especially if I can kick that stupid Pollyanna girl in the shin and run away (okay, hobble slowly still). And maybe then those big clunky Doc Martens will come in handy for leaving a nice, big bruise for her to be glad about. Now that's some positive thinking.