I have two theories when it comes to school supplies and buying them for your children. What is that, you say? You don't have to buy school supplies because you don't live in Idaho? Well, aren't you just special then. I really don't want to talk about it or I might start cursing in Italian again. Okay, I have calmly counted to 10 and can continue now.
The first theory is that all of the stores in Idaho Falls have decided that adults don't have enough fun when they go shopping. So these stores got together and made a master scavenger hunt list out of all the school supplies handed out to us parents. If this is the case, I will gladly trade 8 glue sticks and one Hannah Montana Folder for 3 watercolor sets. Or 3 10 packs of pencils and 4 spiral notebooks. Or both. I just need those blasted watercolors.
The second is that the PTO (Parent Teacher Organization) is a group genius, and they have just hoarded all of the watercolor sets in the grand scheme of making us parents pay exorbitant prices for them later. It is the black market at its finest. And where would these nice ladies learn such deceitful behavior? Well, let me answer that with the following question: who do you think teaches mafia members how to keep things so secretive and borderline legal? That's right, from their moms who were in the PTO and desperate to raise money for new playground equipment.
So what is a frantic parent to do? You have two choices.
You can picket the school with the hourly threat of being killed by the "Momma Mafia" aka PTO, with the hopes that finally the local politicians will recognise the dire situation and declare a state emergency. As well as get in some good camera time for themselves. Then a SWAT team will be sent in to find and release all hostage watercolor sets. Of course, you and your family will be forced into the Witness Protection Program for your efforts.
Or you can choose to act ignorant. Maybe the teacher will never realize you dropped your kid off at school without every school item listed. Be prepared for it to backfire, just in case. "What's that, Mrs. Smith? Little Johnny doesn't have his watercolors? I was sure I packed them in with the other school supplies...Well, give me a day or two to look for them around the house." Then drive up to Canada where the watercolors are a part of socialism and free to everyone. Just don't let those Mounties catch you.
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4 comments:
You make me laugh. Good luck finding those watercolors.
Um, I have a 16 watercolor. Can you find an 8? I would trade you. In addition to the hunt for supplies, Walmart is remodeling which should be against the rule during the dreaded back to school time. I am thinking it's time for Mafia action.
That's what you get for living in Idaho. How many more things have to go wrong before you realize you are meant to be in Utah! Heee, Heee
Haha! Just wait until you are purchasing supplies for those 4 kiddies at once. Not only does it get harder to find everything, it gets infinitely more expensive! And yes, I like the idea where you pay a set fee when you register and your supplies are there when you start school. Makes a lot of sense to me. Maybe that's why you are here, to help revolutionize the school supply situation!
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