Hooray For Home Schooling, Part 1

Just so you all know, I do not home school my children. Yet. But after the problems I have experienced yesterday and today, I just might. Maybe by ranting about it, I will feel better and that urge to yell at administrators will go away. We'll see.
Yesterday, I received a call from the school telling me that Brandon doesn't have a copy of his shot record in his file. I needed to find is ASAP and bring it over to them. So I go to look in my handy dandy purse, which is like the magician's hat and holds EVERYTHING. Seriously, it holds everything. There is a pocket in there just the perfect size for immunization records, and just a little too big for temple names. But that is an entirely different blog post.
I look and find Nadia's record, Benjamin's record, some dumdum lollipop wrappers, and the receipt for some pants I bought someone over a year ago. Brandon's record isn't there. So I look in all my other purses, which all have that same convenient pocket. 20 minutes later, while cursing myself for having a purse fetish and deciding which half need to go to DI, I still haven't found that yellow paper. I start to get worried, because it also has his social security number on it, and if I accidentally left it somewhere, like a doctor's office or the school when I made the first copy so I could register him, I am in big trouble.
Now, some of you may ask why this is such a big deal. The doctor's office has a record there, and it would be easy to go and fill in a new one. Oh ho, not so. I would be labelled as THAT mom. You know, every time something came up like I wanted to start a preschool or get a new job, it would be dragged out into the open.
First Lady: "Yes, everything seems in order here...wait a minute. Does it say that you lost an immunization record here?"
Second Lady: (gasps of terror)
Sarah: (nodding my head in shame) "Yes, it does. I was hoping by typing it so small, it would escape your notice."
First Lady: "Well, we certainly can't have anyone with your lack of morals and organization in such a high position of responsibility. You may go now."
Second Lady: (shaking her head as I leave) "And she seemed so nice. What a shame."
First Lady: "Yes, but remember that even the nice looking apples can have rotten cores."
It is now time to pick up children and wake up Benjamin. I say that in reverse order, because I hate to wake up Ben. He is like me, and doesn't wake up easily or prettily. After fighting him that we really do have to go, staying is not an option, and yes, I will carry him to the car, I go and wait for the other two to get out of school. Which means I also have more time to worry about this lost record and the damage I have done to poor Brandon that will last his entire life.
While sitting there waiting for them to arrive to the car and wondering how much it will cost to replace Brandon's entire identity, I try to remain calm and think where else I need to look.
After picking up kids and getting back to the house, I start rifling through folders in the filing cabinet drawer, on the bookshelves, and then start looking in the desk drawers. I finally found it in the bottom of my drawer, in an envelope along with all the other information needed for his school registration, like his birth certificate and proof of address.
Oh, what sweet relief to know I wouldn't be labelled as the mom who lost her child's shot record. I really don't know if I could have lived that down. Especially since I can no longer eat Haagen Dasz and dark chocolate truffles with abandon. You see, I gained too much weight this month. But that is another blog post and tragedy all unto itself.